MID-SEASON TV NOTES

 

It’s midway though the first half of the season actually, so here are some thoughts. Please read at least this first section because it pertains to tonight.

 

DANCING WITH THE STARS

 

Please read this before voting tonight!

Tonight, there are only five couples left. Last week, they eliminated the crazy, but funny, David Arquette. That means that the person who’ll come in third this season will be one of the worst contestants on there!

In my opinion, that I’ve held since Day 1, the locks for the final two are JR Martinez, who deserves to win, not just because he’s a war hero but because he’s by far the best dancer, and Ricki Lake, who has the advantage of dance training and the biggest advantage of them all–Derek Hough as her partner.

But the other three “celebrities” vying for the three-couple finale are all lummoxes who should have been gone long ago: overall creepy dude Rob Kardashian, who’s far from a “star” that the show title portends, and awful dancers Nancy Grace (who also appears to be a complete wackadoo,) and Hope Solo, who doesn’t really have enough of her first name. (There’s little “hope” for her on this show, in case you didn’t get my brilliant reference.)

Even though she’s really the worst dancer left, I’m begging you all to vote for Hope and Maks. And not even one whit because I have a crush on Maks. It’s for the human drama that will ensue for at least a week if he’s in the final.

In case you missed my Maks vs. Karina obsession in some of my past DWTS columns, here’s the background on this gossip-worthy story: almost three years ago, these two attractive pros got engaged, with Maks admitting that he had a crush on Karina for many years. They appeared together on Broadway in the wonderful ballroom dance show, Burn The Floor. They were always together.

Then, just a little over two years ago, they inexplicably broke-up. Since Karina was just about the only girl I could accept capturing Maks’ heart, (since I’m not available,) I was crushed. And Maks appeared to be, too. After the initial reports, I never heard another word about it. And I’ve always been dying to know what happened. It looked like she was the one who broke it off, and now she’s set to marry baseball player Brad Penny. (I’m not holding my breath on those nuptials either.)

I’ve watched every DWTS episode since the break-up very carefully, (and actually–I hate to admit this–multiple times!,) and I’ve never seen those two interact for even a second! So, this is why I need Maks and Hope Solo to be in the top three this season—the top three couples have to travel to New York together the night of the finale, on a private jet with just them and the necessary show personnel, and do all the next-day press together. The six of them always sit there on Good Morning America, laughing and joking and referring to each other. And how interesting would it be for Maks and Karina to be two of those six people??? My mouth waters thinking of it! And poor Maks will be third while his ex winds-up the winner! It boggles the mind!

So, please everyone, whether you watch the show or not, take pity on poor me and vote for Hope and Maks tonight. (And next week, as well.) And really, who would you rather have in the finale: obnoxious Rob Kardashian, weirdo Nancy Grace, or poor, put-upon, klutzy athlete Hope Solo? Slim pickings, but I’d go with Hope, even if it weren’t for the Maks-Karina angle.

The phone number for Team Maks and Hope is 1-800-868-3408 and you can dial it from 8PM-10:30PM tonight. And each phone line is allowed only five votes, so it’s not a lot of work. (Don’t let them tell you that “your time zone is currently closed,” because it’s not true until after 10:30PM.) You can also vote at abc.com until tomorrow morning.

Thanks so much! I hope it works. I’m really worried that the idiots who follow the Kreepy Kardashians, (though I can’t imagine who they are as I’ve never met a fan of theirs or even read about anyone liking them,) may keep no-personality-or-talent Rob in there.

By the way, if Maks and Hope last through this week, we have to do it all over again next week. And then back to JR for the win!!! yay!

 

BIGGEST LOSER

 

I have just one note on Biggest Loser: Letters from home, or video chats or phone calls, are often the most sought-after prize for winning a “challenge.” But, I don’t understand why the contestants are not allowed to talk to their families to begin with! This is a TV show, not the Gestapo. So, why this controlling tactic?! I think the powers-that-be over there claim it’s to make the contestants function better, without their probable enablers, but an encouraging word for a loved one would definitely make their journey easier, so I still don’t get it.

 

NEW SHOWS I STILL LOVE

 

Revenge

Ringer

Suburgatory

 

NEW SHOWS I’M GLAD I DIDN’T WASTE MORE TIME ON

 

Charlie’s Angels

Whitney

Up All Night

Last Man Standing

 

THE X FACTOR

 

I finally got caught up with The X Factor over the week-end (I hadn’t even seen who the top sixteen were yet!) I’ll publish those copious notes tomorrow or the next day, so please remember to check back for them, if you’re interested.