DANCING WITH THE STARS—SEASON 19—WEEK 1
Three quarters through the first episode of this season’s Dancing With The Stars, I told Mr. X, “I’m just upset with this whole show.”
Yes, there were a few fun moments, like seeing Maks and Meryl sitting together, but overall, it was full of beans.
The judges basically blew smoke up most everyone’s butts, telling them they were so great, when most of them were far from it. And they over-marked many of the supposed celebs, especially the three young girls, because they’re desperate for the coveted young demographic in viewers! They want to keep them on there awhile!
But they totally under-marked several of the older folk! They screwed entertaining fashion designer Betsey Johnson, big-time. The woman had a prop malfunction at the end of her dance, caused by a not-paying-attention-to-the-action stagehand who clipped the boa she was supposed to grab, to the other clothing on the rack she was supposed to grab it from! But, that was with just a very few steps to go. What she did before the incident was great! And she ended with a cartwheel into a full split! At seventy-one!!! Who else can boast that?!
I don’t know who was more upset all night–me or Lolo Jones, who totally screwed-up her own number!!!
There were few “stars”on the show; it was more a bunch of “who are theys?”
I already got depressed at the beginning, as soon as I saw that horrible goony (in a bad way) co-host was still on there. She kept saying, “Get over here” to the performers. So rude. Nobody likes her, so why did they allow her back on there this season?!
I was so glad that the show seemed to be back to two nights now, because last season was so depressing—they had to dance their tushes off, then be eliminated the same night. But, after doing more research, I discovered that the results show is just for the first two weeks. That’s worse—the first couple eliminated doesn’t even get to do a second dance!!!
If you like, you can read my original assessments, that I wrote before the actual shows took place, here: itsnotaboutme.tv/news/television-dancing-with-the-stars-season-19, and then see how they differ from my thoughts while watching the first competition night, followed by my ones on the results show.
First, my competition notes, in order of performance, of course!:
Mr. X and I both noticed that this is the thinnest that pro dancer Cheryl Burke has ever been! But is she back to wearing her early-seasons combover???
I love that Lea Thompson’s partner, new pro Artem Chigvintsev, stood back to let her get her own applause. What a gent.
And she danced great, perhaps because she was a professional ballerina in her teens! Really, once a dancer, always a dancer. (Same with Alfonso Ribeiro, the best one on there, who’s been a pro dancer since he was a kid!)
I don’t think I’ve ever heard Lea talk before, but she was cute and amusing. Mr X really got a kick out of her.
The Pretty Little Liars chick looks just like the regular, skanky girls who danced at my hip-hop clubs back in the day, and not a “star” at all. And she was so much worse than she thought she was.
New judge, (and former pro on this show,) Julianne Hough, whom I’ve always liked, looked dreadful. She needed lipstick desperately, and way different eye make-up and hair.
And, even though I’m thrilled that there’s finally a second judge (besides Len Goodman,) who’s actually a ballroom dancing expert, it can’t be easy for the dancers who were on the show before she was, (as a pro dancer,) to now be judged by her! I can’t even imagine what that would be like.
I’m really a fan of Val Chmerkovskiy, but he makes us think he’s sleeping with every partner. I guess he does take after his big bro, Maks. They’re just kissing and hugging guys, which is, more often than not, a good thing.
I’ve always been one of Lolo Jones’ few fans, but her dance was dreadful. I feel awful for her, and especially her pro partner, who’s new to the show, who’s probably now going to be the first to leave. (I wrote this before the results show, of course.)
The whole production was kind-of a loose mess.
They screwed Betsy Johnson on scores. She just had a last second prop screw-up, but her dancing was excellent enough.
I actually know nothing about Tavis Smiley (because I don’t have the insides for political shows,) but he did a really good job, especially for a big, older man. His dance was fun.
What happened to having the announcer declare before the performances, “Dancing the foxtrot, with her partner so-and-so, …”? The show needs that! They did write what the dance was in the bottom corner of the screen, but that can’t possibly be enough notice for most of the people watching the show, who rely on the audio cue! The man is already on the show, announcing the judges’ names when they do the scores, so why not keep him announcing the dances?! Stupid, unnecessary cut.
I’m sick they didn’t pair the duck girl with Louie Van Amstel!!! That would have made her gay-hating father choke!!!
And she was dreadful! They judges so over-praised and over-marked her! Maybe they were afraid her family would break-out shotguns! (I never saw their show, of course, but that’s what I imagine it to be like.) Mr. X and I thought they’d be a bit kind to her, because she’s young, but that was just ridiculous. How did they give her 8s and 9s??? Mr. X, a dancer himself, said she danced like there was no music!!!
The Waltrip man is like a Christopher Guest character. What he did was walking, not dancing. But, of course, they way over-marked him, too!!!
They must have told Julianne to not be a bitch (like she was, especially to Maks, last season on her one guest shot,) because she was being nice to most everyone, instead of honest.
I’ve always been a fan of Allison Holker, but it’s not fair to all the ballroom pros in the world for her to have this job. She’s a contemporary dancer, not a ballroom one. I bet Derek Hough made them hire her, because they’ve worked together before.
And, I feel bad saying this, but she looks awful. Is she possibly anorexic? I looked like that when I was.
Her partner, some guy who did a movie a decade ago, (so how the heck is he a “star?,”) barely moved. So, of course, they over-marked him, too. She did the Derek trick of making us all watch the pro, rather than the supposed celeb partner, so we think the duo is good, when it is not.
Tommy Chong was the most fun!!! Even though I’ve met him briefly a time or two, I had no idea he was that funny! Even with saying nothing. Hope he’s on there a long while.
Karina did a great job with Randy Couture, another one I had never heard of. Mr. X and I couldn’t believe a big guy like that was able to be so smooth.
I couldn’t figure out why judge Carrie Anne Inaba was crazier than usual last night, telling all the men that she was hot over them, and how sexy they are. It was really weird behavior, even for her. And then the reason dawned on me—the new guy, Artem, is her ex!!! Aw-kward.
The judging panel was disgusting and dishonest all night. They ruined the show for me.
I have an idea—why doesn’t that YouTube girl make a video about removing her mustache??? I never saw her vids, since I never heard of her, but who would listen to her about make-up or fashion??? She looks forty-five, not eighteen.
Her dancing was pretty bad, but I knew the judges would kiss her butt because they so desperately want young viewers.
The whole show, I kept thinking, “Let’s get to Carlton already!!!” But I knew they’d keep Alfonso Ribeiro for last because I knew he’d be the best. And, of course, he was! You go, boy!!!
But, I was so disappointed he didn’t do his Carlton dance! Maybe he’s saving it for when he gets through each round.
I’m happy they paired him with Witney Carson because I knew she’ll be good for him. But, I think they did that to court the young viewers, as well, because she’s the youngest pro, and they knew he’d be on there until the end, so her peers might tune-in for her each week.
And now, here are my thoughts on last night’s results show:
I’ll cut to the chase first: I was indeed correct that Lolo Jones and her partner, Keo, would be the first duo to leave. More on their weird exit in a second.
Poor Smokey Robinson had to sing with awful Aloe Blacc. Blacc sounded like he needed some aloe, for his throat! I don’t think he hit one note right! He was so dreadful that he even threw Smokey off a bit. How did this dude get famous?!
Here’s an amusing tidbit from the backstage scenes they showed, which I don’t know if anyone else caught: The Mean Girls guy called the Duck Dynasty chick, “duck girl.” When the supposed celebs don’t even know who each other are, how are we supposed to???
I’m so happy for endearingly nutty Betsey Johnson to get another chance to show her stuff, with no prop malfunctions. She deserves to still be on the show.
Lolo Jones, the first celeb to go (and one of the few real “stars,”) was absolutely gracious in defeat. She basically said that the result was how it should be, and she’d feel awful if it had been anyone else who was eliminated first. Very lovely of her.
Her creepy partner, Keo, on the other hand, was a total d-bag to her!!! I’ve never seen anything like it before, on Dancing With The Stars, or any other elimination show, for that matter!
Keo was downright rude to Lolo in his speech. He said that working with Lolo was “interesting” because she had so many “crises!” I was shocked! I had to play it back several times to make sure I heard him right!
Then he said basically that what was important was that he got on TV! I hope to never see him on mine again.
I don’t think he even realized how disgraceful his behavior was. He didn’t even dance with Lola at the end!!!! He turned away from her, and begged the rest of the dancers to come onto the floor then. What a d*%#! I feel bad that Lolo got voted off before Michael Waltrip, and those two lummox teen-age girls, but I’m soooo glad that Keo was the pro to leave! I hope he’s not back next season. Tony Dovolani didn’t even throw Kate Gosselin under the bus like that when he was saddled with her a few years ago. Nor did Master P’s partner, and he was the worst cast member in the almost ten years of the show!
So, there you have it—the beginning of this season of Dancing With The Stars. If next week, they could get rid of Michael, YouTube chick, the Pretty Little Liar, and Duck Girl, all in one fell swoop, I’d be one happy viewer.