SPORTS/KAREN'S MUSINGS: MANTI BUTTERFLY

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MANTI BUTTERFLY

 

Okay, these are are my last comments on the Manti Te’o girlfriend hoax. I’m semi-sick of the topic, and its just a sad scene, all around. But, as I was watching the perpetrator of the hoax, Ronaiah Tuiasosopo, on Dr. Phil the other day, (a show I never watch because I find Phil nauseating, but this was a rare case,) something occurred to me: the whole debacle reminded me of the very strange case of M Butterfly.

The Frenchman on the left, and the man posing as a woman on the right.

I actually researched it after, just to make sure I have all the facts right. The true story was turned into a Broadway play and subsequent film, with much of it being fictionalized. But the essence is correct; it’s the tale of a young French man working in China in the early ’60s, who falls for, and has sex with, a feminine man who claims to really be a woman. It’s really fascinating; I suggest researching it when you have a few extra minutes. In actuality, they slept together only a few times at the beginning of the relationship, but their bond continued for almost twenty years, till the French guy found-out the truth.

He was horrified at the deception, (especially since it included a son who the Chinese man posing as the woman claimed was the product of the two of them!) The Frenchman is now openly gay, but says he wasn’t at the time and thought he was bedding a very shy woman. He still doesn’t know how the little guy pulled it off, but the big guy was only twenty at the time, and had no previous sexual experience except for one quickie with a hooker.

But to me, the moral of the story is that if you love someone, that’s who you love. We’re dealing with the essence of someone’s being. (The other moral is…have sex with the lights on occasionally!!!)

So, I feel that Manti may need years of therapy to get over this hoax. Yeah, it turns out the person at the end of the line was a guy, not a cute girl. But if Manti loved that person, with whom he’s spent about a year of intense phone conversations, wouldn’t he still love him? At least sort-of? He fell in love with the persons’s inside, not the outside; he had never even seen the “girl” in motion, just a few still photographs! So, Manti’s head must be spinning, wondering if this whole debacle might mean he’s gay. Or at least bi. (The moral of this story is: don’t say out loud that someone is your girlfriend or boyfriend if you’ve never met them!!! Especially if you’re someone in the public eye and not a crazy hermit!)

Manti Te'o on the right and Ronaiah Tuiasosopo on the left.

Any way you slice it, it’s a mess. This poor boy Ronaiah, (yes, I’m sad for him as well as for Manti,) says he’s a “recovering homosexual,” because it’s so frowned upon in his culture. (The boys are both Samoan.) But there’s no such thing. You either are or you aren’t. Or you’re bi. You can’t change any of it on your own just because you want to. I’ve talked to many guys about this, because I just don’t understand what they could be going through inside, and they’re all in agreement on this topic.

Now that I’ve covered why I’m calling this whole scenario “Manti Butterfly,” I have just a couple of thoughts on those two Dr. Phil shows that Ronaiah appeared on, back-to-back. They cruelly, for no reason than the prurient interest of the viewers, forced Ronaiah into “doing the voice” that he used as the girl. It was just crazy. And you know what? At first, (before the definitive reciting of the exact voicemails he had left on Manti’s phone,) Phil’s experts said there was no real probability that this guy was indeed the imaginary girlfriend, (oooo–isn’t that a great name for a novel,) which would mean he had a female accomplice. (Which makes me ponder: Yeah? And…?) Upon that final reading, it was determined that the fictitious “Lennay” was indeed Ronaiah. So, guess what? This guy just showed-up the FBI and CIA! I love that aspect to this whole crazy story!

And lastly, to Dr. Phil’s thinking-he-was-profound questions of “Was this some sort of elaborate plot between Ron and Manti? Was Ron deceiving Manti alone or with the help of a female co-conspirator?,” I add, “And how is it any of our business?”

And now I’m done with the topic. And everyone else be should be, too.

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