THEATRE: GARDEL’S TANGO

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GARDEL’S TANGO

I’ve rarely had so many good laughs as I had while watching Gardel’s Tango at the Zephyr Theatre recently. The problem with that is—the play is a drama!

The whole thing is a hot mess. At first, I thought it might be a tad interesting. It was sort-of like watching a foreign film but, unfortunately, I needed the subtitles. The closest thing I can liken it to is an SNL skit of a pitiful foreign film.

Richard Lewis Warren and Mantha Balardou.  Big White Bazooka Photography.  (None of these pictures depict the actual show.)

Richard Lewis Warren and Mantha Balardou. Big White Bazooka Photography. (None of these pictures depict the actual show.)

It’s the tale of real-life tango singer, Carlos Gardel, and takes place in his native Argentina, but every single character has a different accent! (I believe most of them are real, but all from each actor’s native country.) And Richard Lewis Warren, who plays Maestro, doesn’t even bother to disguise his heavy New York accent, except on a very few lines, which makes it even more confusing. He sounds more like he’s doing a character out of The Godfather than portraying an old Argentinian singer!

I was actually trying not to judge too much at first, but then Gardel’s love interest, played by the dreadful Mantha Balourdou, mentioned her age. My friend, Alice, leaned over and asked, “Did she just say she’s fifteen???!” My mouth was hanging open, as well. The woman is a Lisa Rinna doppelgänger…now! Not as a young girl. As the action went on (and on…and on…) we realized that the main characters are all supposed to be young people, but they’re portrayed by senior citizens! No lie. What a confusing mess!!!

Agustin Coppola and Anibal Silveyra.  I ask you--do these look anything like the  teen-agers they are supposed to be portraying?!    Big White Bazooka Photography.

Agustin Coppola and Anibal Silveyra. I ask you–do these look anything like the teen-agers they are supposed to be portraying?! Big White Bazooka Photography.

I did love the singing of Anibal Silveyra, the man who plays Gardel. And I’d be happy to hear him in concert, or anyplace else. But the real Carlos Gardel became famous when he was still in his teens, and died at only forty-four. So, why in the world is someone who has to be around sixty portraying him?! And his mother in the show mentions that he and his friend are in school now. The “schoolmate” is even older than Gardel; he’s a very senior gent, with gray hair, to boot! The casting is just crazy and inexplicable. (About ten minutes into the play, my note was, “What’s up with the ages?! The mother just told her son that he’s a man now, but he’s like sixty! He’s been a man for forty years! And they keep referring to him as a kid!” I can’t improve on those notes.]

Saratoga Ballantine and Anibal Silveyra. Big White Bazooka Photography.

Saratoga Ballantine and Anibal Silveyra. Big White Bazooka Photography.

Those two men keep calling Maestro “old man,” but the actors are all clearly the same age! (Can you understand some of Alice and my mirth now?) This is the bizarro Bugsy Malone, the film where a child Jodie Foster and her fellow kid actors play grown-up gangsters. In Gardel’s Tango, everyone is old, but playing youngsters! (I do not say any of this as a slam on any of the actor’s ages or abilities; it’s just that none of them are right for the parts, age-wise. It’s worse than when forty-five-year-old Kevin Spacey cast himself as twenty-to-thirty-seven-year-old Bobby Darin in Beyond The Sea! Talk about vanity. Yeesh.)

And why are the two men, who are playing single boys, wearing wedding bands throughout?! I’m pretty sure those are their rings in real life, but here’s a news flash for them–when you are acting in a play, you have got to take them off! Acting 101, people!

At least the sets, by Daniel Keough, are good.  Photo by Karen Salkin, as is the big one at the top of the page.

At least the sets, by Daniel Keough, are good. Photo by Karen Salkin, as is the big one at the top of the page.

Here are a few more annoyances with this production: The lead character refers to himself as “Gardel” all the time, rather than saying “me” and “I.” How pretentious! Also, there are a lot of crazy prop situations. At one point, Gardel is pretending to drink…from an empty glass. Oysh. Then the mother is crocheting…with no yarn! And they use obvious computer-printed pages…as an old French newspaper!!! How hard would all these be to correct?! (The answer is—not at all.)

Then, at the end, a scene of Gardel and his lyricist pal talking ends, and the next scene is of Gardel’s funeral! There’s no explanation of his death. It’s like we fast-forwarded the DVR! (Which we wish we could have done for the whole show.)

Anibal Silveyra, Mantha Balardou, and Richard Lewis Warren.   Big White Bazooka Photography.

Anibal Silveyra, Mantha Balardou, and Richard Lewis Warren. Big White Bazooka Photography.

I concluded that one hundred percent of the problems lie with writer/director/producer John R. Lacey. Outside of the above-mentioned Mantha Balourdou, whose nasal voice I could not even listen to, (it’s so horrible that I, who can do impressions of most people, can’t even imitate it!,) the acting is more-or-less okay, considering the awful script they have to deal with. It’s not the actors’ faults they were all terribly mis-cast.

But the one good thing about seeing this play now is that a film about Carlos Gardel’s life, (I feel safe in assuming that it definitely won’t be based on this muddled play,) is due out next year, so at least you’ll already be a tad familiar with the story. From my research, this whole debacle appears to be a very fictionalized version of events, but it just may whet your appetite for the real thing.

Mercifully, Gardel’s Tango ends this week-end. But if you need some good laughs, you may as well go see it. Please just make sure to sit in the last row, so you can get your chuckles on.

Gardel’s Tango running through December 18, 2016
Zephyr Theatre  7456 Melrose Avenue  626-381-9767

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