A little over ten years ago in this very e-zine, I posted an extremely bare-bones, basic list of things every woman needs in her life. In the opening paragraph, I wrote, “Here’s the original one, with my very first thoughts off the top of my head. Sometime down the line, I’ll re-visit it, give it real thought, and see how it’s changed, if at all.”

For now.

For now.

How prescient of me because, without even having re-read that, I recently figured it’s time to check on it, and see which have stood the test of time, and then perhaps add and subtract. (If you’re curious about that very first one, here’s that link: itsnotaboutme.tv/news/list-ten-things-every-woman-should-have. But promise not to judge! At least you’ll get to see just how far INAM has evolved in this past decade!)

The items on my list are all basically simple, which means they’re pretty easy to acquire. See how this list compares to your own thoughts on the topic.

(And no worries for the guys—I’ll get to you down the line. But #1 applies to absolutely everyone out there!)

1. Self-esteem—This one is self-explanatory. If it’s something you lack, (and doesn’t that apply to just about all of us?,) I’ll give you some tips on how to gain some in a future article on here. So, until then, stay as confident as possible, and remember that in this case, you can fake it till you make it. And then you may be able to teach something to the rest of us!

Lucy and Ethel--a wonderful example of close friendship.

Lucy and Ethel–a wonderful example of close friendship.

2. One Friend You Can Really Trust–Every gal needs one friend who truly has her best interests at heart. And yes, I do know that this is the hardest item on this list to get. But once you weed through the fake and fair-weather friends, and find the true gold one, he or she will be a treasure for life.

3. One Reliable Doctor!– It would be great if he or she is your primary care doc, but, for us femmes, a fabulous, trustworthy gyno is even better. Just make sure to tell him or her every single thing about your overall health, so they come up with the best diagnoses.

4. Cash!–Yes, I know that the majority of us use credit cards or Apple Pay or the like these days, but in these crazy times you really need to carry even a little bit of cash. You never know when your credit card will be declined, even erroneously, so act like a Girl Scout and always Be Prepared!

young-long-haired-woman-standing-front-mirror-looking-reflection_198278-40865. Full-length Mirror—This one is no joke. A few years ago, my bestie at the time and I were trying on pants in a dressing room, and when I was shocked at how chubby I had gotten, she asked me, in all seriousness, “Don’t you have a mirror in your house?” I burst out laughing because it sounded so funny, but I realized I hadn’t been checking myself out properly because my full-length mirror was behind a door. Ever since, I’ve made a practice of making sure I know what I look like walking out the door.

6. A Reliable Cell Phone—Not just a cell phone—a reliable one. Like cash, every female should have a very working, fully-charged phone at the ready. I hope you never need it, but we should all have one at the ready, just in case of emergency. (And, yes, lunch is an emergency, ladies!)

Here's a celebrity with a moustache--Kare Upton, who, as a top model, should know better!

Here’s a celebrity with a moustache–Kare Upton, who, as a top model, should know better!

7. Moustache Remover Cream–I cannot stress this one enough. I’m absolutely shocked by just how many females don’t know enough to get rid of their unfortunate ‘staches! Even some celebs. Years ago, I was trying to fix one of my female pals up with a cute guy friend. As I sang her praises, he asked, “So what’s wrong with her—she has a moustache?,” to which all his buddies laughed. And the sad thing was that, yes, she did have one. That she bleached! Trust me, ladies—that does not work. At all. It just gives you a blonde moustache. So please get rid of it with remover cream. Or have electrolysis. Shaving and threading just leave follicle stubble. Yuck.

And here's some woman who did a “beauty” video, (which I saw only because it came on after my own mani tutorial,)  who's  rocking a 'stache while telling the rest of us how to do our make-up!!!  Hey lady--look in the mirror first! (At least she's wearing earrings, which you'll read about below.)

And here’s some woman who did a “beauty” video, (which I saw only because it came on after my own mani tutorial,) who’s rocking a ‘stache while telling the rest of us how to do our make-up!!! Hey lady–look in the mirror first! (At least she’s wearing earrings, which you’ll read about below.)

8. Eyelash Curler—this is the simplest one, but, oh, what a difference it makes! Even if you’re too time-constrained, (or lazy,) to apply mascara, just a quick curling of the lashes will brighten your face.  Just don’t use one of the heated ones—it’s much too dangerous to put heat right up against your eyes!

9. Hand Cream—Even young guys have told me that they can tell a woman’s real age by her hands. So get into the habit of using hand cream at least twice daily, (one being when you’re going to bed,) no matter how old you are. The earlier in life the better, of course, but in this case, it’s really better late than never.

10. Lip Balm—Chapped lips look awful, (and feel even worse,) and there’s only way to ward that off—by daily and often use of any form of lip balm, preferably a slightly tinted one if your full face is going to be seen. Even all the creepy lip fillers won’t stop the condition, so heed my words.

The best, and least expensive, body exfoliator!

The best, and least expensive, body exfoliator!

11. Exfoliation Mitt or Glove–I know that a lot of us are vigilant enough to moisturize our bodies, but it really doesn’t achieve maximum effectiveness unless you first exfoliate your skin. So, before you step into the shower, or even if you’re not taking one at the moment, just pop on an exfoliation mitt or glove, and do a quick once-over of your body. That gets rid of all the dead cells, leaving your skin ready for deep penetration of the lotion or cream or body butter. (I first discovered the glove version at an uber-high-end spa in the Desert. I couldn’t imagine what luxurious item the woman was using to exfoliate my body, and when it was over, she showed me it was just a glove from a dollar store!!! That changed my life, as I’m hoping to do yours.)

A hodgepodge of earrings.

A hodgepodge of earrings.

12. Earrings–I just never think any female looks complete without earrings. My mother never wore make-up except for lipstick, but she would not be seen without earrings. And she had to wear clip-ons because, being the very natural woman that she was, she wouldn’t pierce her ears. The funny thing is that for a few years when I was doing my TV show, and my hair guy cut all of my hair off by accident, I wore mis-matched earrings all the time, (which was perhaps to distract people from my suddenly almost-bare head,) and then in her later years, my mother did the same thing, but even though sort-of on purpose, with no design in mind. She just kept a bunch of earrings in the little pocket of the car door, and she took out any old two as she was emerging into the public!

And here’s a pair of auxiliary ones for those of you who can’t live without a vehicle:

A Reliable Car—If you live in a place where public transportation is not an option, or a good one, it’s important to make sure that your vehicle is reliable. It can even be an old jalopy, (or the modern-day version of one,) but it has to be reliable. I’ve actually been broken down a few times with girlfriends who didn’t put the wellness of their car at a premium, and they were very not fun experiences.

A Reliable Mechanic—Same as above. Sort-of. If you own a car, or even a motorcycle, you must be able to trust that its mechanic is not going to rip you off. Ask friends, family, and associates; look up reviews on-line; do general research around your neighborhood; and even visit a few garages before you choose one. And always trust your gut for the final decision.

And that’s my list. For now. I’m sure many more will come to me as life goes one, and then I’ll publish A Dozen (or so) Things Every Woman Needs, Part II. In the meantime, I’d love to know what you deem essential, so please share those thoughts in the Comments section below.


1 Comment

  1. Great advice, Karen! Re the full-length mirror and eyelash curler: Iconic makeup artist Way Bandy was asked what three things a woman should have if stranded on a desert island and he replied a dark eyeliner pencil, an eyelash curler, and a full-length mirror!

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