THE SPICE TABLE
Years ago, I reviewed a restaurant called Gadsby’s on something like LaCienega or LaBrea or one of the “La”s. (I’m not talking about the fabulous old Gatsby’s in Brentwood, which was, unfortunately, before my time.) There were four of us and the portions were so minuscule that, even after sharing just about everything on the menu, we each had to stop for fast food on the way home. It was so unique in it’s non-generosity that we all still refer to it from time to time. We don’t even need to say the name; we all know which eatery we mean by “remember that place with the tiny portions?”
Their website photo. We were the only ones in there the evening of our visit.
In all my years as a restaurant critic, I had never come upon such mini plates. Until recently, that is. Lucia and I were in Little Tokyo for the Art In The Streets exhibit at The Geffen Contemporary at MOCA, and she spied The Spice Table, a place that had just been recommended to her. It must have been by someone who’s anorexic, as it turns out!
Besides the food sitch, it was a very hot summer day, and we walked in to find…a fire burning by the bar! I do think that perhaps it was for cooking on, rather than ambience, but give me a break. They need a better system; the place is small, and, though they had just opened for the night, even the host was already sweating up a storm!
So, after I disrobed a taste, including removing all my beautiful jewelry because my hands were swelling from the heat, we settled down to dinner because we were pretty hungry and didn’t want to go on Quest For Food. (And Lucia was really into it and I wanted to be a good pal.)
The waiter, though cute-looking, informed us several times that the cuisine was “authentic Southeast Asian inspired by Singapore and Vietnam,” like we were morons who didn’t get it any of the previous times he had stated it. Or who could just read it on the front page of the menu.
When I asked if they could leave the spicy sauces off the burger special, he said he doubted the chef would do that. While I understand that chefs want you to taste their creations, and not the customers’ version of them, it always seems a tad dictatorial to not let us have it our way. But, the menu even states that “Changes and modifications are politely declined,” so there you have it.
The waiter also informed us that they serve it family style, though they must be expecting families of just one with those teeny portions! And he said it all comes out at once, but the three dishes we ordered dribbled out, with the potatoes sitting on the table for at least five minutes before the veggies, then the chicken, arrived. Not a great way to do things. I’m just really not into the tyrannical chef thing that is de rigueur in some newer restaurants nowadays.
In all honesty, the three dishes were really tasty. But as soon as we finished the “meal,” and I use that term loosely, I said, “Okay, I’m ready for the entrees.”
This photo is from their website because I was too hot there to think to take my own pictures. But you can see how close to the food they had to shoot to not point out just how miniscule it is!
The $8. chicken satay was downright insulting. It was a plate of four skinny, short, pencil-size slices of chicken on skewers. They were the size of doll food! I didn’t even really know how to eat them! They were accompanied by a thimbleful of peanut sauce.
The order of sambal fried potatoes was just a tad bigger, although the taters did have a delicious crispness to them. But the grilled bok choy with three mushrooms was also far from hearty.
Like I said, it all tasted good, but one would really need at least four dishes for oneself to feel close to satisfied.
It hit me later that we didn’t even get any kind of table snack, like bread, crackers, chips, or even edamame. Do the Vietnamese not have snacks???
And they had only two weird desserts, kaffir lime custard, (you don’t even need a spoon to gag me with that one!,) and soft serve in strange flavors. No wonder Southeast Asians are so thin! Maybe we Hollywood folk should have a telethon for them.
We wound up getting delicious cream puffs elsewhere in that ‘hood after, which were pretty filling, but we still got hungry in a little while.
This experience was actually a few months ago, but I didn’t want to publish it right away, in case, by some miracle, I actually wound-up understanding it upon further reflection. But no. It actually gets more infuriating with distance, especially when I visit other eateries that are generous, or at least compared to The Spice Table.
No info because it’s not worth eating at.
