GOLDEN GLOBES 2019
Though still good, these were pretty much the most lackluster Golden Globes in recent memory. Or even long-ago memory. They really need Ricky Gervais back as the host!
I’m behind in my film screenings because we actors don’t have to vote for SAG Awards for another almost three weeks, and I need every bit of that time to see them all. (I still have ten movies left to go!) And I haven’t even heard of most of the TV shows, nor people on them. (I have satellite, of course, and have for much longer than just about anyone else, but I’m still a strictly network type of gal.) So I was at a semi-loss as to for whom and what to root. Awards are way more fun when you have dogs in the races.
I hope you all read my live-tweets as the afternoon and evening went along yesterday, but if you did not, you can still read them now, @MajorCelebrity, because I’m not repeating most of those sentiments here. I hope you do because there is so much juicy stuff in there! (For the lazy among you, here’s the link for you to just click on!: www.twitter.com/MajorCelebrity.)
Surprisingly, there was just one arrivals show this time. Actually, maybe it’s not so surprising after all because I think the public’s interest may be waning due to the glut of awards shows these days. But I’m happy about that dearth of coverage because it’s much less for me to watch and write about. I’m thankful for small favors such as those.
Okay, here are my moment-to-moment thoughts as the action unfolded:
Regina King looked great. I love her shiny pink dress.
And how embarrassing for Ryan Seacrest to be wearing basically the same tuxedo jacket as Regina’s son!!!
I was just about as shocked as Carol Burnett was that Ryan Seacrest didn’t even acknowledge her waiting to speak with him; he instead went to some girl from a current television show! And left legendary Carol waiting for several minutes while he did one of the longest interviews he’s ever done! That was so rude of him.
And then, while Carol was still there and standing by, Ryan went to a tape of his sister asking this woman for baby toy advice! I am absolutely floored by that bout of rudeness from him. And then, after all that, he goes to a commercial instead of to Carol Burnett! When they came back on-air, he had to go to someone else because Carol obviously was as insulted as I was for her that she didn’t feel like continuing to wait any longer. (So it looks like they filmed the Carol Burnett interview to show later, and even then, he had nothing to say to her. How does an interviewer not have questions prepared for such an icon, especially one who’s getting an award that night, that’s…named after her?!?!?! Truly shameful of Ryan Seacrest.)
Thandie Newton’s hair looked like mine when I’m too embarrassed to leave the house before it’s done! Also, like Monica in the Bahamas!!!
Justin Hartley always seems so nice. I’m happy for his success on This Is Us because I still feel bad for him that The CW screwed him out of starring in Arrow after playing Green Arrow on their show Smallville, all those years ago.
Melissa McCarthy is just thrilled that she’s no longer the heaviest person in show business!!! (In case you haven’t noticed, it’s now Chrissy Metz of This Is Us. Duh. And FYI—she totally did call Alison Brie a bitch!!! I can’t believe she’s even trying to deny it. We all heard it. And, here’s a news flash for her–it’s on tape forever!!!)
I adore Emily Blunt, but that strapless bra under her dress is way too tight! It does not look right, and makes the skinny girl look like she actually has back fat, which, trust me, she definitely does not! (I had just seen her at an event the day before, so I know.)
I know this is not the popular thing to say, but it’s honest–Lady Gaga is so homely, even with her nose job. (It has not affected her career at all, so good for her!)
Is Constance Wu wearing just a beige bra as the top of her dress??? Yes, fans of my former TV show, I have done that before, but not at an awards show, especially one in which I was nominated!!!
Michelle Yeoh‘s all-green outfit was somehow beautiful.
But boy did she need her nails done–they looked horrible. Michelle–get a manicure! In general, of course, with those gnarly nails, but especially if you’re wearing rings that you know will be talking points!
WTF was Timothee Chalamet wearing??? Was that a joke???
But he seems to be a thoughtful young man. And he was genuinely thrilled to be meeting Ryan Seacrest! Go figure.
Kaley Cuoco looks great.
Irina Shayk knows how to pose naturally better than anyone there.
The two dresses I liked the best were Olivia Colman’s perfect one, followed closely by Nicole Kidman‘s long-sleeved maroon sequined dress, which she is the only person who could have pulled it off!
GOLDEN GLOBES SHOW
This one is out of order, but I have to say right here that my favorite moment was not only seeing Dick Van Dyke on the telecast, but the enthusiastic reception he got from people who really understand the magnitude of what this uber-pleasant-and-talented icon has achieved over his life. And still is! I had just seen him dance in Mary Poppins Returns the day before the Globes, and the same thing happened…in a screening, without him even there! I love that he’s so beloved by all.
Now to the nitty-gritty of the Globes, in order that they happened:
Sandra Oh’s buttocks hangs low…and it’s uneven. So why did they have to shoot her from behind? That was perhaps just mean of them to do.
What is up with the top of Lupita Nyong’o’s head? Is that her hair or a hat??? (Mr. X said, “Hat,” but I really think it was her hair. Does this show not have mirrors anywhere???) And her weird blue make-up didn’t help.
That monolog by hosts Andy Samberg and Sandra Oh was good enough, but it was the least funny one in years. That was most likely because everything has to be politically correct these days, which is so strange. It’s the same reason I had to keep stopping myself from tweeting a lot of what I was thinking. I was afraid that if I criticized anyone of an ethnicity other than mine, or someone heavy, or wrinkled, or whatever, I’d be labeled as something not good, which is so not fair. (That’s why different on-line publications, like DailyMail.com, keep saying how “stunning” Chrissy Metz looks. Forget how unattractive all that weight is—I want to point it out to save her life! But I’m still not allowed.)
How does Michael Douglas, who’s been in the public eye for most, if not all, of his life, not know enough to trim his nose hair and eyebrows?! Especially when he’s up for an award??? That just boggles my mind.
How stunning is Halle Berry still? And just look at her gorgeous neck!!! I can’t believe she’s fifty!!! How is that even possible? (By the way—I’ve been saying that she’s the most beautiful woman for very many years now. So I love that she still is.)
Patricia Arquette‘s boobs looked like they were going to explode any second. Why do so many women think that popping-out their giant boobs is attractive?!
And while I’m on the subject, I can’t understand why so many of them want to feature their bare middle-of-the-chest area. Do they think it’s sexy? It just looks stupid.
Lucy Liu looked so different than she does on Elementary. I can’t quite put my finger on what it was—Mr. X thinks it’s her newly-blonde hair, but she also gained some weight, (not in a bad way,) and I thought her face looked older. When I researched her later, I found-out that she’s…fifty-years-old!!! I thought she was about a decade younger, so, without her make-up artists on the show, she finally looks her age. I think that’s what it is.
How rude of the producers to introduce the next presenters, and have them walk out, while major honoree Carol Burnett wasn’t even off the stage yet!!! After her, they should have definitely gone to commercial!!! (It’s not like time was a problem—they wound-up going about a half hour over, so what harm would thirty more seconds have done?!)
That was so rude of Taylor Swift to not say, “You, too,” to Idris Elba when he told her she was “looking good.”
Allison Janney’s boobs looked very weird.
This was the first time that usually-fashionable Janelle Monae looked like an idiot.
I didn’t recognize Megan Mullally at all. Maybe she had a facelift that didn’t work.
And her dress was the worst. Perhaps it was her tribute to honoree Carol Burnett because it looked like Carol’s back-in-the-day parody of what Scarlett O’Hara took out of the window.
Christian Bale totally deserved his win! And his was, by far, the best speech of the night, (and for many years.) That was bloody brilliant! As was his performance as Dick Cheney in Vice. I especially loved that he thanked Satan for the inspiration of the character. Perfect!
Olivia Colman’s speech rocked, as well. I had never heard of her before recently, and I haven’t seen her film yet, but now I’m a fan.
I loved the looks on everyone’s faces while Jeff Bridges was rambling on. But I do love that he thanked his longtime stand-in!
Exactly how much dope did Jeff Bridges smoke before he gave his totally wacky acceptance speech?!
Glenn Close’s speech made me cry, even though I haven’t yet seen her film! (I actually waited in line for the very first screening The Wife, way back in the summer, but they stopped admitting people about six in front of me, and didn’t even tell us we weren’t getting in!) Her non-waterproof mascara let us know she genuinely did not expect to win!
She looks great for her age, which I thought she was when I first saw her in The World According To Garp about a hundred years ago!
Okay, that’s it for my 2019 Golden Globes coverage. I really would write more, but I have to go work on my articles about the attendant gifting suites! So look for those this week and next.