![\"Derek](\"https:\/\/itsnotaboutme.tv\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/10\/Screen-Shot-2024-10-24-at-10.00.15-PM-e1729882237485.png\")
<\/a>Derek and Hayley Hough dancing on Dancing With The Stars ten months after her health scare.<\/p><\/div>\n
Because of what that couple has been through this past year, I\u2019m now leaning towards reversing my long-held stance against marriage.\u00a0 Just about eleven months ago, Hayley collapsed backstage while on a dance tour with Derek, was rushed to the hospital, and had an emergency craniectomy! If they hadn\u2019t been married, he couldn\u2019t have made the immediate decisions that may have saved her life! After several years of living together, they had just gotten married a little over three months prior to this terrifying medical incident, a decision they must be grateful for every day since. Their ordeal really does need to give us marriage-eschews pause.<\/p>\n
<\/a>The back of Hayley Hough’s head after her emergency surgery.<\/p><\/div>\n
More recently, I was reading an Am I The A**hole<\/em> post, (which is my new obsession\u2014I highly recommend it, to realize that your own<\/em> problems are not that bad,) and it brought the whole thing home to me again.<\/p>\n In the post, a young guy was upset that his live-in girlfriend, who is the love of his life, has never wanted to get married because she says she\u2019s not \u201cready,\u201d and now she\u2019s still<\/em> refusing to, even though she desperately wants them to have a baby, which they\u2019ve actively been trying to do. He wound-up breaking-up with her because he feels that if she\u2019s ready to have his baby, she should feel the same about them being married. And, very shockingly, after spending my whole life never believing in marriage, (even though, as you know, I\u2019m madly in love with Mr. X,) I now totally agree with this guy.<\/p>\n So, for that guy\u2019s potential baby even more than for him<\/em>, I beg her to reconsider and marry the guy, which I can\u2019t believe I\u2019m honesty saying now! I never think a couple needs to be married to be parents, but when it\u2019s so important to one partner of a long-time couple, why not?<\/p>\n Before I continue with my new thoughts on marriage, here are some of my reasons for always being against the institution:<\/p>\n Who is a stranger<\/em> to \u201cpronounce\u201d us husband and wife??? It\u2019s up to do us<\/em> to do so.<\/p>\n How does a piece of paper make the relationship other than what it is??? It\u2019s the same, good or bad, either way.<\/p>\n If one of us wanted to leave, why does it have to be complicatedly by that legality? It will either be okay enough or a mess, no matter what.<\/p>\n Some couples may be happy like this.<\/p><\/div>\n Getting back to the positives, there are, of course, different ways to join together in \u201choly matrimony.\u201d My wonderful friends, Gina and Aaron, have my favorite \u201cwedding\u201d story. They were young and living in Aspen, and simply walked over to the courthouse and said they want to get married. Gina told me that the only question they were asked is\u2026if they were siblings!!! How weird. They assured the officiant they are not related, gave the guy $10., and that was that! I love that story. And now they\u2019re three kids in, and still going strong more than two decades later.<\/p>\n In my own<\/em> life, Mr. X wanted to have a \u201csurprise wedding\u201d a couple of years into our relationship. (I know\u2014everyone has always thought that he<\/em> won\u2019t marry me<\/em>!) I told him he can\u2019t uprise me with a wedding, but he said the surprise was not for me<\/em>, but for our guests<\/em>! He said we\u2019ll invite them to a party<\/em>, but when they get there, it would actually be our wedding<\/em>! They would have all been shocked, and now I wish we had done that. But I asked him, \u201cWhat about the gifts? I\u2019m not getting married without receiving at least some bowls<\/em>.\u201d He hated that I needed gifts to get married, but came up with a funny idea, (which he was really joking about, but I liked it.) He said that after the ceremony, the guests would each spin a wheel with our gift choices on it, and they\u2019d have to get us the one they landed on! I asked, \u201cBut what about our financially-challenged guests?,\u201d to which he replied, \u201cWhat they land on is what we\u2019ll<\/em> buy for them<\/em>!\u201d How did I not marry him right then and there?<\/p>\n So I told this story on my TV show, and then guess what? Several celebrities began having surprise weddings!!! Everyone in LA watched my show back then, so I have no doubt that it was Mr. X\u2019s creation they were using.<\/p>\n<\/a>