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<\/a>Just a couple of my many tweets you may have missed last night. Photo by Karen Salkin.<\/p><\/div>\n
Those idiots on the show need to stop announcing things like, \u201cComing up\u2014A special Grammys moment that you’re sure to be talking about tomorrow!\u201d Who are they to declare something special when it hasn’t even happened yet?! The only thing I’ll<\/em> be talking about today is how truly un-special this year’s Grammys was! There wasn’t too much pizzazz about this one. It wasn’t like the times that we truly<\/em> remember\u2014like when a young Ricky Martin brought down the house. Or when Jennifer Lopez wore that green dress. This had nothing memorable about it.<\/p>\n I don’t like to reprint all my tweets, so if you’d like to see the ones I sent out last night, (or my daily ones,) please follow me @MajorCelebrity<\/strong>. If you do it right now (right after you finish reading this column, of course,) you’ll be all set for my live-tweets during the upcoming Oscars (and all<\/em> awards shows.)<\/p>\n But, now, here are some thoughts I mostly didn’t<\/em> tweet during the show, in the order that I had them (which is the order that they occurred, of course. Duh!):<\/p>\n <\/p>\n E CHANNEL ARRIVALS<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n <\/p>\n ChrisBrown’s grafitti mural at the Grammys Museum. Photo by Karen Salkin.<\/p><\/div>\n That was probably the best that host Giuliana Rancic ever looked. Maybe because she was hiding her arms and legs. But that was on the pre<\/em> pre show. Why in the world did she change out of the better outfit for the arrivals<\/em> show??? (Someone must have told her how Olive Oyl-esque she looked when she changed her hair into a low bun, because she quickly took it out, making some lame excuse for doing so.)<\/p>\n Katy Perry. She looked even more putzy than this in motion!<\/p><\/div>\n Gwen Stefani<\/strong> was so nice and appreciative and honest. She’s a real person.<\/p>\n I loved Ed Sheeran<\/strong>‘s honesty.<\/p>\n They showed Chris Brown<\/strong>‘s artwork at the Grammys Museum, and I must say, I was impressed. (When they first mentioned it, I guessed it would be graffiti, and it basically was! But this time it was commissioned<\/em> graffiti.)<\/p>\n Katy Perry<\/strong>‘s outfit was wrong on every level.\u00a0 It was a strange midi length, which highlighted her piano stool legs, and it was half see-through, but on a mom-style dress, with a belt!<\/p>\n Nicki Minaj<\/strong> copied my ring finger junk nail! (That means it’s all blinged-out.)<\/p>\n Katherine McPhee’s awful, creepy, dirty-looking ‘do. Photo by Karen Salkin.<\/p><\/div>\n Jessie J<\/strong>‘s slicked-back blunt cut was ugly, but at least it looked on purpose<\/em>, unlike Katherine McPhee<\/strong>‘s dirty-looking do.<\/p>\n Zendaya<\/strong> looked gorgeous!\u00a0 And so grown-up.\u00a0 (But she’s still so phony.)<\/p>\n John Mayer<\/strong> looked sickly. Too skinny.<\/p>\n I still hate Taylor Swift<\/strong>. She did not have the cleanest hair, either. But her dress was pretty good. (I liked the purple shoes, but not with the green dress, unless she was doing purple jewelry, too.)<\/p>\n Jennifer Hudson<\/strong> is not as skinny as she<\/em> thinks she is.<\/p>\n Why in the world would Anna Kendrick feature that non-existent rack??? Photo by Karen Salkin.<\/p><\/div>\n Everything about Kim Kardashian<\/strong> looks plastic. Her face, body, teeth. Her husband mentioned, “I just get bored with things really easily,” as he looked at his wife! Is the handwriting on the wall?<\/p>\n And didn’t she look a bit like a married-to-John-Warner-era (meaning \u201cfat\u201d) Elizabeth Taylor?<\/p>\n Wiz Kalifa<\/strong> didn’t even wait for the interviewer’s questions! He just let it all out! Good for him. This is the second year in a row that I liked him!<\/p>\n Anna Kendrick<\/strong>–nice rack.<\/p>\n Rihanna<\/strong> won for Most Hideous Dress. She looked pregnant.\u00a0 And her boobs had muffin tops. The whole presentation was worse than Lady’s Gaga’s egg back in the day.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n CHANNEL 5 ARRIVALS<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n <\/p>\n It was nice that they opened with Pentatonix<\/strong>, who had just won an award, singing for a second.<\/p>\n Sam Rubin’s co-host this time was a woman named Sisanie. How obnoxious of her to have just one name, like Cher.<\/p>\n Hozier. Am I right or am I right? Photo by Karen Salkin.<\/p><\/div>\n Seriously, how does someone go to a big event as Hozier<\/strong> did? He can’t change his bad teeth that quickly, but he can<\/em> wash his filthy, messy hair. [Note: I realized during the show that it may have been just wet. Not definitely, but maybe.]<\/p>\n This idiot co-host woman kept saying that everything is “amazing!” You cannot imagine how I detest that!!!<\/p>\n They interviewed completely different people than E did.\u00a0 That makes it more interesting. (At the end, it turned-out only three guests overlapped! Wow.)<\/p>\n Former Miss Universe, (and Nick Jonas<\/strong>‘ girlfriend,) Olivia Culpo<\/strong> was by far the most gorgeous, classy-looking person there!<\/p>\n Just because I had no other place to put it, here’s Rihanna’s crazy dress. Even worse than her muffin-topping boobs is her knarly messed-up hair. How pissed is she that her hair looks like that in every picture?!<\/p><\/div>\n I loved Barry Gibb<\/strong>‘s honesty.<\/p>\n Creepy Pauley Paulette<\/strong> finally changed her hair-do, but it was still the filthiest hair ever.<\/p>\n I don’t know who Brandy Clark<\/strong> is, but she seems nice. (But it turned-out, her song was my favorite part of the night!)<\/p>\n Zendaya’s dress was hideous. It reminded me of the Carol Burnett Gone with the Wind<\/em> skit dress. She’s so phony, though, and full of beans. She acted like a kid doing the interview in her bedroom, dropping nick-names of everyone like they were her close personal pals.<\/p>\n Best interviewees on both channels: Tom Jones<\/strong>, Nile Rodgers<\/strong>, Ed Sheeran, Gwen Stefani.<\/p>\n Jane Seymour<\/strong> finally looks old. Yay!<\/p>\n I still don’t know who Antonique Smith<\/strong> is, but I love her now!<\/p>\n Ariana Gradne’s ill-fitting shoes. Photo by Karen Salkin.<\/p><\/div>\n Ariana Grande<\/strong>‘s feet looked like she was playing dress-up in her mother’s shoes.<\/p>\n More filthy hair, this time on Charli XCX<\/strong>.<\/p>\n Great Big World<\/strong> seems so nice.<\/p>\n Weird Al Yankovic<\/strong> found his look, and stuck with it.<\/p>\n Outside of that co-host woman saying everything is \u201camazing,\u201d she actually did a good job.<\/p>\n I’m a bit surprised that Josh Duhamel<\/strong> seemed so nice. (But why was he a presenter?)<\/p>\n Paris Hilton<\/strong> must be so relieved for Kim Kardashian’s existence because now so many fewer people make fun of her<\/em>.<\/p>\n This hit me later, so I went back for the exact quote: Sam Rubin stated, “This is the awards show where the awards don’t even matter,”\u00a0to which Sisanie confirmed, \u201cExactly.”\u00a0 Are they insane???<\/p>\n <\/p>\n<\/a><\/a><\/a><\/a><\/a><\/a><\/a>