This year’s rendition of the US Open tennis tournament was particularly juicy. I’ve already covered some of the fun, and especially the many controversies, in my previous columns, so now we’ll get to all my thoughts on everything else.

Jannik Sinner and Carlos Alcaraz. Photo by Karen Salkin.

(If you’re a tad behind on all of it, and are curious as to exactly what has happened, you can still read about the star-studded Mixed Doubles here: itsnotaboutme.tv/news/tennis-the-2025-us-open-began-yesterday, and here are the links to my articles about all of the interesting, and sort-of sad, issues with the proceedings: itsnotaboutme.tv/news/holiday-happy-labor-day-week-end-2025 and itsnotaboutme.tv/news/tennis-us-open-2025-controversies-so-far.)

Before anything fun, good, or interesting that I’m about to weigh-in on, I first must discuss the absolute hoggishness of hideous-in-every-way Orange Hitler, who showed-up to watch the Men’s Final. There were no Americans in it, he looked like he would much rather be on the golf course, (and cheating, of course,) and he showed-up to the US Open just for his own self-aggrandizement. (So what else is new?) That was so incredibly selfish and rude to the competitors who didn’t need that major distraction, and even moreso to the spectators, who were then delayed getting into the Final by first, increased traffic, and then subjected to longer security measures. The crowd, many of whom had paid thousands of dollars to see Jannik Sinner and Carlos Alcaraz, missed much of the match because of Hitler’s extreme hubris. People sacrificed their time, money, and other events to attend this one, and I’m sure they all had looked forward to seeing it for a long time. But the Cheeto Satan cared about only himself. Truly disgusting.

Just SOME of the people whom Orange Hitler made miss a lot of the Men’s Final! They were at the end of the first set (of four) when these ticket holders were still stuck outside! Photo by Karen Salkin.

Now on to happy topics.

I congratulate the two victors, Aryna Sabalenka and Carlos Alcaraz! I can’t believe that both of the people I rooted for won! Actually, I also triumphed with my choices for the Mixed Doubles from the start, and of the two duos in Women’s Doubles, I got that, too. (I still don’t even know who won the Men’s Doubles because ESPN didn’t show it and never mentioned the winners—nor even the two finalists!—of that discipline even once!!!)

US Open Champion Aryna Sabalenka. Photo by Karen Salkin, as is the one at the top of this article.

There’s so much to say about Aryna’s and Carlos’ historic victories, but those cut-and-dry facts you can read in many other places. There’s so much else to cover that I have to leave the topic of winners at this. Except to ask—can you imagine if those two played Mixed Doubles together??? Boy, would I love to see that!

And now, here are my random thoughts on everything else. (In no particular order):

~ First and foremost, I give all of these players and coaches sooo much credit for speaking so well in English! It’s truly amazing and something that I feel that most of us in America take for granted.

~ In the second women’s semi-final between Naomi Osaka and Amanda Anisimova, ninety percent of the crowd from the earlier semi was gone! That was very strange because Amanda is American, and Osaka is a human oddity. Perhaps because it was after midnight on a weeknight, but it was Thursday, and on the holiday week, so I don’t get leaving an interesting and important match.

~ Both Women’s Doubles winners, Gabriela Dabrowski and Erin Routliffe, congratulated the runners-up before even lauding each other! On the other hand, after declaring how classy she is all tournament long, runner-up Taylor Townsend didn’t even have the class to congratulate the winners at all! Her partner, Katerina Siniakova, did, but sort-of half-heartedly. What bad sportsmanship.

Sam Querry and John Isner. (And yes–they ARE standing up!) Photo by Karen Salkin.

~ British commentator Jason Goodall, said of Tommy Paul’s recent engagement, “He’s got himself a decent Mixed Doubles partner now for life; let’s keep our fingers crossed there.” Ouch!

~ I occasionally wonder how people adjust to post-tennis-playing life. It has to be a total shock at first, but recent-players-now-turned-ESPN-commentators Sam Querry and John Isner are making me feel better about what I imagine. All of a sudden, those two became such grown-ups, in their suits and ties and interviewing other players, some whom they even played against!

I guess that ESPN really trusted that duo because Sam and John even did segments alone!!! And they were good! Sam hosted them, with his good voice, in just his first year with the network! Wow.

Lorenzo Sonego, aka The Karate Kid. Photo by Karen Salkin.

And it appears that John has even been working on lessening his lisp! And it’s fun to have some younger commentators. It was amusing to hear the two of them discuss if Italian player Lorenzo Sonego looks more like Luigi of the Mario Brothers or the Karate Kid! (John said, “He’s the Karate Kid to a tee!”) They even started calling him “Ralph Macchio” during their coverage of his match!

~ American player, (and heiress—her fam owns the Buffalo Bills and Sabres!,) Jessica Pegula is the most honest, normal-talker perhaps ever in tennis. I hope she becomes a commentator when she’s done playing.

~ In the first round, Coco Gauff and Ajla Tomljanovic had the most very long rallies I saw during the entire tournament! I could not believe what I was seeing. Their match went almost three and half hours! It was good of Ajla to hang in there so well with World #3 Coco.

~ The commentators barely even mentioned the Mixed Doubles during the two weeks of the rest of the tourney, after all the fuss they made about it the week before!

~ Taylor Fritz always has the creepiest group of people in his box, especially his fake-faced girlfriend and her chubby, duck-lipped mother. Ugh.

Taylor Fritz’s coaches, friends, and family box. Photo by Karen Salkin.

~ Why can’t ESPN mix the sound better??? The whoosh of the crowd on the two main courts at night was dreadful! At times we couldn’t make out a word they were saying, especially Jason Goodall who whispers to begin with!!!

~ Tommy Paul’s outfit is the neatest, (in terms of looks, not like the beatnik “cool.”)

~ Someone has to be the one to say this, so it may as well be me: Those hideous Y-3 outfits that a lot of the players wore looked like a white bedsheet right after a heavy flow during a woman’s “time of the month.”

Just one of the many players with those hideous outfits! Photo by Karen Salkin.

~ I’m thrilled that someone finally said a word right! Mary Jo Fernandez said that someone played “aggressiveLY,” as opposed to the stupid, (and unfortunately, usual, for all the commentators,) “aggressive!”

~ But the poor vocabulary continued for the rest of them. New commentator Coco Vandeweghe, who seems to think she’s all that and a bag of chips, keeps saying “prefala” for “plethora.” OMG! She shouldn’t be using a word when she has no idea what it is!!! You know how stupidity like that chaps my hide. (On a side note, a few hours later, out of the blue, Mr. X said, “Vandeweghe—that chick can rap!” I love that assessment!)

~ And then Sloane Stephens, Sam Querry, and John McEnroe, along with some others, need to learn how to say the simple name “Naomi!” They all pronounce it “Niomi” with an “i” instead of an “a”! That is so illiterate of them. How does no one correct them? At the very least, Naomi Osaka herself should! It’s infuriating for all normal-brained people listening to it. I was so thrilled that ESPN got rid of Alexandra Stephenson, who always did that mispronunciation, too, this year. It’s maddening.

~ And all of them were absent the day they taught kids the difference between “fewer” and “less,” and “number” and “amount.” (So that you guys don’t sound really dumb, too, here’s the difference: “fewer” and “number” are for things that can be counted, such as points, dishes, shirts. “Less” and “amount” are for situations that cannot be counted. Things like water.)

~ Tommy Paul’s coach, Paul Stine, and Pam Shriver, (who should have really known better,) both said, “hyperbolic chamber,” instead of the correct “hyperbaric!” Even Mr. X noticed it!!! (In case you want to be more intelligent than they are, “hyperbolic” means exaggerating the truth for emphasis or impressive effect, such as, “I haven’t done that in a zillion years!,” whereas “hyperbaric” means “of or involving a gas at a pressure greater than normal,” usually used about hyperbaric chambers.)

~ Actually, the organizers need to go back to school for a grammar lesson because they keep billing tennis, in general, as “the healthiest sport in the world!” That statement actually means that the health of tennis itself is the best. What they mean is that tennis is the most healthful sport, meaning that it gives health to the people who engage in it. Things and concepts can’t be healthy—only living entities can; situations and things can provide good health to people, animals, plants. (I think I need to start tutoring bigwigs, don’t you?)

~ Everyone should be as classy as Carolina Muchova when she takes her bow after a win. No fuss, nor screaming, no even really making it about herself! Just a simple wave of the arm.

Happy Venus Williams and Leylah Fernandez. Photo by Karen Salkin.

~ The very new Women’s Doubles team, Leylah Fernandez and the newly-returned Venus Williams, seemed to be the happiest people there! They either tied the Italian team of Sara Errani and Jasmine Paulino in the elation category, or perhaps they even had more fun than those two adorbs munchkins!

~ All the ESPN commentators kept trying to make like Coco Gauff and Naomi Osaka are such good friends, and constantly declared Naomi to be Coco’s “mentor.” In an on-court interview after a win, Naomi even said of Coco, “I kind of still see her as a little sister.” But, in a press conference, Coco set it all straight by saying, “We aren’t super close or anything, but we are friendly with each other.” But commentators just ignored that honesty because it doesn’t fit their narrative.

Naomi Osaka in the dress she said she designed. Guess she loves bloomers! Photo by Karen Salkin.

~ Speaking of Naomi Osaka, here are a couple of reasons that I find her totally annoying: 1) She has to start every sentence with “Um.” And I’m not exaggerating, even one little bit! 2) Another annoyance is that she thinks she’s a fashionista, but looks like an idiot!!! Even Mr. X said, “How stupid an outfit!” And several people on-line said things like, “I didn’t realize that bloomers were back!”

~ Carlos Alcaraz is just adorable! He always answers every question, and with no bullshit, to boot. His replies are thoughtful, and he explains his innermost thoughts. And he does it all with excellent English vocabulary! I love him.

~ The crowd was so rude to everyone who played Taylor Townsend. I was rooting against them as much as I was Taylor!

~ To end with something totally positive, this was adorable: Lin-Manuel Miranda and his wife were in the first row at one end of a Carlos Alcaraz match, and as Carlos was being interviewed post-match, the Mirandas saw themselves on the big screen, and Lin took a pic of them. (I’m assuming that this is what happened by the visuals.) He excitedly showed it to his wife and they had a really big laugh about it. That was so regular-person of them! Loving it.

Now that we’re down to the Quarterfinals of this year’s US Open tennis tourney, it’s time to discuss a few of the highlights, or perhaps more accurately, the lowlights, of the first week.

There were a few headlines, some of which I’ve already written about. (You can still read about the star-studded Mixed Doubles here: itsnotaboutme.tv/news/tennis-the-2025-us-open-began-yesterday, and about one of the biggest first week controversies here: itsnotaboutme.tv/news/holiday-happy-labor-day-week-end-2025.)

Now here are a few more:

COCO GAUFF’S SERVE

American Coco Gauff has been having serving problems all year, so she fired her coach, (which she does a lot,) and hired mechanical expert Gavin MacMillan, to help her fix it. The poor young girl has still been an open wound, crying and shaking through her matches, (right after I had made a note that she’s so mature now.) Someone really needs to step in and help her.

But what chapped my hide was a statement Gavin made in an on-camera interview with Pam Shriver. He basically ragged on all his previous clients and all her previous coaches! He said, “Obviously, there’s a lot of past memories in there that we’re trying to overcome, but that’s a matter of repetition now. You know the only goal was to try to put the foundation down so that this is solved forever for her, and let’s see what she does, because as you know, there’s nobody better athletically out here, she has the best backhand in the world, and her competitive spirit is unmatched.” And then he thanked the commentators on ESPN for their support, trying to make it sound like the sports channel personnel care more about Coco than the other players. That is so frigging rude of him, on so many levels.

Pam Shriver’s interview with Coco Gauff’s new coach, Gavin MacMillan. Photo by Karen Salkin.

Then just as I was seeing red about his rudeness, Patrick McEnroe, the studio host, asked commentator Brad Gilbert, “So what do you make of this new development for Coco?,” because Brad had been her coach for a few years. (I’m adding: during which she finally got really successful, and won her first of two Majors.) Brad answered, “Well, Coco’s a perfectionist, and obviously, the way things were going in Cincinnati, third time she lost to Paolini, she probably felt like, ‘You know what, I probably need to make a change.’ And Gavin got let go by Sabalenka, and then all of a sudden, she felt like, ‘I need to address this.’” So Brad discreetly let us know that this jerk did not leave Sabalenka—Sabalenka fired him! (And from what I understand, Aryna is the one who recommended him to Coco in the first place! So no need for him to be so bitter.)

By the way—Mr. X erroneously thought that I don’t like Coco. I actually do—it’s the jingoistic reporting about her that I can’t stand. And I admire her maturity.

TAYLOR TOWNSEND—JELENA OSTAPENKO DEBACLE

So, even before the controversy that began immediately after the second round match between Jelena Ostapenko and Taylor Townsend—the two most out-of-shape-looking, most obnoxious women on the whole tour—I couldn’t wait to see how this one played out. I didn’t know which one to root against more! And I knew the end handshake would be something to witness.

When Taylor was screaming at the spectators to make noise for her, the commentator said admiringly that she was “whipping the fans up to an absolute frenzy here.” So, let me get this straight—it’s okay for an American to do that, but not European Daniil Medvedev???

Taylor Townsend whipping the crowd into a frenzy, according to the commentator. Photo by Karen Salkin.

In case you don’t know about the controversy that began at the handshake and still has not ended entirely, here’s what happened: Jelena, who lost, admonished Taylor that she was rude to not have apologized when she won a point by a “net cord,” which means it hit the top of the net, which helped it go over to win the point. All the players say “sorry” when that happens for them, even though we viewers are sure they don’t mean it. But it’s just the polite thing to do, and is sort-of an unwritten rule of tennis. So Taylor nastily told Jelena that she “doesn’t have to do anything,” and an argument ensued, with Jelena, who’s from Latvia, telling Taylor that she’s “classless” and “uneducated.” So, of course, people made it about race, which it was not—Jelena gets into it with just about everyone she plays against, win or lose. I think she’s universally disliked.

People have to stop saying that in disputes between people of different ethnicities, the lighter one is a racist! You can tell when it is true, and it’s far from always the case. And, even though I don’t know either of them personally, I highly doubt that Jelena is racist. And that’s because she’s also been difficult with other players, all white, through the years. She’s just an equal opportunity arguer.

Jelena Ostapenko and Taylor Townsend arguing at the net after their match.

Taylor should have just said she’s sorry when Jelena pointed-out that she hadn’t apologized for the net cord. All the players do a “sorry” gesture for a net cord, no matter how insincere, as James Blake pointed-out they all are. And then the rest of the dispute would have not happened.

And it turns-out, (as has been pointed-out by several people on social media,) that in languages around the world, “uneducated” means rude or without manners; it has nothing to do with *schooling at all. (My note on the schooling issue in a couple of paragraphs.)

So, Jelena issued a few apologies on-line, but people were still saying she’s a racist. Her last apology explained what I just did about the definition of “uneducated” in her country.

In my opinion, if Taylor were truly classy, upon hearing Jelena’s most recent apology, she would have said she didn’t realize the language difference, and that she appreciates the concept and apology. And that would have been the end of it. Instead, she was still berating Jelena to the press. Oh well. The tournament seems to have finally moved on, so I’m letting it go, as well.

Jelena Ostapenko’s final apology and explanation. Photo by Karen Salkin.

*[Note: Even though I have no idea of Taylor’s level of schooling, she did say a couple of not-bright things in the next few days. In one instance, she said “incidences” instead of the correct “incidents.” But even worse was this: In response to something Jelena said, Taylor said that she had beaten Ostapenko outside the US, with, “I beat her in Canada, which is outside the US, and I beat her in New York, which is outside the US.” She thinks that New York is not in the United States??? She may not be uneducated, but she was definitely absent that day!]

[And FYI—no other outlets wanted to show Taylor saying something so wrong, so they left it out of their written reports, or, if it was a video, they cut that part out. People.com wanted to publish her whole statement, so they corrected her “outside the US” to “[inside]” (in brackets,) which shows it to be corrected, hoping that their readers don’t know what brackets mean, or, if they do, they won’t be able to figure-out which wrong word was changed.]

And by the way, just a few days later, another player, Anna Kalinskaya, also chastised her opponent for not saying sorry for benefitting from the net cord! But, most likely because both players are white, the commentators never said a word about it!

If you’re wondering, I’m the furthest thing from racist myself, which you’d know if you knew my whole life. I was abused by white people for a long time for being in a biracial relationship before Mr. X, and because of their ignorance, I got rid of several people I had considered to be friends at the time. I just judge everyone on their actions, not by skin color, religion, gender, size, or anything else many are biased against. (But if you have yellow teeth, you might face my wrath.)

A CONTROVERSY NO ONE ELSE IS MENTIONING, BUT IS VERY IMPORTANT, IN MY OPINION

The US Open’s signature beverage, the Honey Deuce. Photo by Karen Salkin.

As I covered in my first US Open column this year, (link at the top of this article,) a young SoCal tennis player, Braun Levi, was tragically killed some months ago by a drunk driver. They even honored his family here by having them do the coin toss at Novak Djokovic’s third round match the other night, to give a bit of publicity to their foundation that is in Braun’s memory.

So, everyone at ESPN is extra-aware of the evils of alcohol. Yet, every single one of the commentators has joked about or lauded drinking! Often they’re talking about the famous-ish alcoholic beverages that are served at the tournament, (like the main one, the Honey Deuce,) but they even occasionally just say how fun drinking is, in general! Coco Vandeweghe even sang the praises of morning drinking!!! That is soooo offensive! Someone needs to tell them all to stop, especially this year!

LETTING KIDS RUN DOWN TO “AUTOGRAPH POSITION” BEFORE THE MATCH IS OVER!

Kids at the bottom of the stands. Photo by Karen Salkin, as is the big one at the top of this page.

There are always kids (and some grown-ups) at the bottom of the stands begging for autographs at the end of matches. But I had never given a thought to how they got there! It turns-out that they run down from higher up, many with the giant tennis balls to sign. And all that is well and good.

But this year, they’re allowing the kids to run down while the match is still going on! That is so distracting to the players. One time, I saw the guards even telling them to go back up, but all that movement and noise is also distracting.

They need to just not allow it to happen in the first place! Dot, dash, end of story. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure that one out.

Next week, I’ll do the wrap-up of the tourney, with some happier thoughts. I hope!

And I was almost caught unaware! That’s because this final Major tennis tourney of the year has always begun on a Monday, never on a Sunday. So there’s already a lot to report!

First of all, the notoriously least-watched discipline, Mixed Doubles, already happened! They held that competition last week, (which I’ll explain in a minute,) because they changed it up quite a bit this year. (That’s how I knew that the Singles began yesterday—I had advance notice to watch the Mixed Doubles, and the commentators kept apprising the viewers of this schedule change.)

The poster says it all.

So I’m discussing that situation first.

Instead of the contests being vied for by unfamiliar duos who always play the Mixed Doubles on tour, this year the US Open went with teams comprised mainly of the singles stars of the sport, such as Emma Raducanu and Carlos Alcaraz, (for whom I rooted.) [Note: It’s a shame that Grigor Dmitrov had to withdraw due to still dealing with the pec injury he suffered at Wimbledon last month. He was set to team up with the #1 girl, Aryna Sabalenka, and I would have loved to see those two ferocities play together.]

Mixed Doubles Champions Andrea Vavassori and Sara Errani. As I say about Mr. X, so Italian, so intense!

The organizers wanted those stars in the competition in the hopes of drumming up viewers and ticket buyers, and they accomplished just that. So, in order to encourage those players, the Mixed Doubles had to be contested a week earlier than even the start of the entire tournament because the players who hope to go far in the Singles would never agree to play Doubles while they were still vying for Singles titles!

The new format was definitely interesting, but it was a hard one for me because I feel so awful for the usual doubles teams, who are more often than not made-up of players of whom the casual fan is unaware, who count on playing it. They’d love a title, and they need the money, too, as little as it is. So those people were totally screwed by this new format, even though the audience loved it.

But, to the usual doubles teams’ credit, one of them, Italians Sara Errani and *Andrea Vavassori, who were the defending Champions, won it again! And against very formidable star opponents, six-time Major Champion, Iga Swiatek and three-time Major Finalist, Casper Ruud. I like Iga and Casper, and were happy for them to do well, but I was appalled that they were talking to each other right behind the winners while Sara and Andrea were giving their Champions speeches! (In Iga and Casper’s defense, they don’t usually play any kind of doubles, so they’re not used to having a teammate with whom to go over the proceedings. So I have a feeling they didn’t even realize how rude they were being. But they should have known better, just as people!) *[Note: “Andrea” is a guy’s name in Italy.]

Iga Swiatek and Casper Ruud, (in the middle,) rudely talking to each other while Mixed Doubles Champion Sara Errani, (far right,) was trying to thank her partner, Andrea Vavassori, (on the far left.) Photo by Karen Salkin.

Now, as far as the Singles competitions go, the big disappointment for me is that Italian Stallion, Matteo Berrettini, also had to withdraw due to injury. I get to see his stunning visage only twice a year, during Wimbledon and the US Open; Wimbledon totally screwed me this year by not showing him even once, and now this. C’mon, tennis gods—give a girl a break here! (But I had forgotten how good-looking Matteo’s countryman, Lorenzo Musetti, is! So at least I have him to look at. We’ll see for how long, though.)

Canadian Open Champion Victoria Mboko and runner-up Naomi Osaka.

And this year I have someone whom I’m actually rooting against perhaps even more than Novak Djokovic! Yes, you read that correctly—even more than Novak. And it is—drumroll, please—Naomi Osaka. I’ve never really been a fan, (but I was thrilled when she beat Serena Williams here way back in 2018,) but now I downright dislike her for something she pulled earlier this month at the Canadian Open.

She was beaten in the Final there by young up-and-coming Canadian Victoria Mboko, and…didn’t even give her a mention in her runner-up speech! That’s unheard of in sports, especially tennis! At the very least, they always say, “I want to congratulate [so-and-so] and their team.” That was rude of Naomi, who I feel is often a poor sport these days. Her excuse for not mentioning Victoria? She forgot! With the girl standing right next to her! OMG.

So I’m very happy to see that Victoria is seeded #22 here at the US Open, while Naomi is right behind her at #23. Ha!

The late Braun Levi.

And now I have to tell you of a devastatingly sad story; it does have a heartwarming aftermath, which I’m thankful to also share, although, of course, I wish it had not happened. In May, young Los Angeles tennis player, Braun Levi, was killed by an “alleged” drunk driver. (For some reason, it seems that everyone talking or writing about the tragic situation is required to say “alleged” drunk driver, so I am, too. But not only does it appear that the woman was over the alcohol limit, but she also had no license anymore! What a disgusting person!)

So in his memory, Braun’s family, (who had already lost their Pacific Palisades home in the fires in January—how is any of this fair?,) started the Live Like Braun Foundation. (You can learn more and/or donate here: livelikebraunfoundation.org.)

Emilio Nava, (before he buzz-cut his hair for this Major.)

The heartwarming part of this story is that another young American player, Emilio Nava, who had never even met Braun or his family, decided on his own to help raise awareness for the foundation! How many twenty-three-year-olds would even think of doing that, especially when they’re getting ready to play in the first round of a Major tournament?! I have never rooted for anyone more! (Outside of Roger Federer.) About all that, commentator Jason Goodall told us, “Nava wanted to get the story about drunk driving to the forefront of everyone’s mind. Emilio said, ‘I’m trying to end drunk driving.’” Braun’s mother, Jenn Levi, commented that Nava asked, “What can I do to help spread the movement?” The guy even invited her and her family to be his guests at his first-round match! What a kid! Jenn also said that the US Tennis Association has lifted them up and supported them. I had to take a long break after learning about all of that. (If you’d like to understand more about their connection, here’s a good article I just found: www.atptour.com/en/news/nava-us-open-2025-feature.)

Aryna Sabalenka, who I think is so pretty. Photo by Karen Salkin.

To not end this article on that heartbreaking story, let me say that I do hope that Aryna Sabalenka, (who I believe is making a concerted effort to not “grunt” as loudly as usual,) wins the women’s championship, but that’s about all of the emotional involvement I can muster this year; as I was watching yesterday’s first day of play, I realized that my mind kept wandering, and I wasn’t really caring about most of the outcomes.

If anything particularly interesting happens, or if I just have to rag on someone’s extreme stupidity, (which usually occurs via moronic ESPN studio host *Chris McKendy,) I’ll, of course, post my live thoughts on all the proceedings on X, the former Twitter. My moniker on that platform is @MajorCelebrity. I hope you’ll join me there in seeing how it all unfolds.

US Open commentator James Blake with Karen Salkin, about a decade ago, and just recently discovered! Photo by INAM staff.

*Here’s a quick taste of what I’ll have to say over there about Chris McKendry’s idiocy, which has already begun: Yesterday, at the end of an interview she was doing with Top Ten player Ben Shelton, rather than thanking him and then telling the viewers, “We’ll be right back with Taylor Fritz,” she very rudely told Ben, “We’re going to ask you to step aside. You are the #2 American, #1 is waiting right over there” referring to Fritz. How unbelievably rude of her! How is she still employed???

Let’s all hope it gets better from here.

After missing what people are labeling the best Men’s Final in the history of tennis at last month’s French Open, I haven’t missed one second of the next Major, The Championships Wimbledon of the past two weeks. And the tournament has been mostly fascinating.

But before anything else, I  have to commemorate the fiftieth anniversary of the late great Arthur Ashe winning this tournament. It was quite the coup, and more importantly, a historic feat for a black man. I didn’t witness the Championship match against Arthur’s fellow American Jimmy Connors, but I still remember where I was and with whom when he passed away.

Grigor Dmitrov grabbing his torn pec. Photo by Karen Salkin, as is the one above.

I also must spare a thought for Grigor Dmitrov.  The thirty-four-year-old veteran player who had been expected to win at least one Major back in the day, but is now towards the end of his career, was two-sets-to-none up on World No. 1 Jannik Sinner in the fourth round. And then…he tore his pec! So, of course, he had to retire from the match and tournament. Sinner’s elbow had just been injured a bit in that match, so it was looking very likely that Grigor would have won, and then move on to the important Quarterfinal! And this is the fifth consecutive Major in which he had to retire with an injury! Sometimes life is just not fair. (But don’t cry for him too much—his girlfriend is gorgeous actress Eiza Gonzalez, so she’s probably nursing him back to health.)

Adorable Carlos Alcaraz, watching a clip of something he did on court. Photo by Karen Salkin.

And then, just a few days later, yesterday, Sinner won the Championship!!! Over two-time defending Champion Carlos Alcaraz! They’re both lovely young men, so I can’t be sad, but I was rooting for Carlos. Oh well. He already has a quintet of Majors himself. So congrats to Jannik. And also to Iga Swiatek, a first-time Ladies Champ. I’ve actually never seen someone more excited to win here. And then they got to dance together at the Champions Ball last night, so I can’t wait to see video of that!

Now I have to vent about some of the ESPN on-air personnel right away, before I get to anything else:

Mr. X pointed this one out, and I can’t believe I never noticed it before. When the coverage begins or comes back from break, the unseen announcer calls it “WimbledAn” as opposed to the correct “WimbledOn.” How is that even possible???

I’m very upset with the channel because they deprived me of seeing even one second of Matteo Berrettini’s gorgeous visage! (He lost in the first round, and they never showed any of that match!)

ESPN studio host Chris McKendry, whose reporting is even worse than her fashion sense. Photo by Karen Salkin.

I’m glad the oldsters are still the tennis commentators on ESPN, but I cannot stand the way they infantilize each other’s names, such as “Cliffie,” (Cliff Drysdale,) “Pammie,” (Pam Shriver,) “Stubbsie,” (Rennae Stubbs,) “Chrissie,” (Chris Evert,) and even “John-nie” (for basic “John McEnroe.”) Ugh. It’s sooo creepy. All they’re missing are Sleepy, Grumpy, and Dopey. Doc wouldn’t stand a chance with these peeps!

It was so much better this year to hear Patrick McEnroe start off the coverage each day instead of that annoying woman, Chris McKendry. She gets dumber every year. So let’s get to just a small percentage of her stupidity:

I have no idea why, but they let her take the lead on commentating a few matches, (even though she’s the main studio host,) and she did not stop talking all through Aryna Sabalenka’s entire match!!! McKendry should never be allowed in a match booth again! The commentators are supposed to be mum during the actual points! How could she not know that???

And, later, she told a new member of their team to “remember to talk,” when they’re commentating, making it sound like she had forgotten to do so! All she did was talk through every point!!!

Then she mispronounced Emma RadUcanU’s last name as “RadAcanA!” What a moron. She’s the friggin’ host, for goodness sake—just learn the players’ names before you get on the air and embarrass yourself!

Andy Roddick, looking less than great as a guest in the Royal Box. Photo by Karen Salkin.

And, when Carlos Alcaraz won his quarterfinal, she said, “…first time Alcaraz is playing Week 2.” What was she even talking about?! He’s won the whole thing for the past two years! So this is at least his third time into Week 2! Why doesn’t anyone at the desk with her correct her already, especially when she gives out such incorrect info! (She later told us that two girls played “fifteen years ago” in…2016! Can she not do basic math??? That was nine years ago, not fifteen. Ugh.)

Then she interviewed Andy Roddick at the end of the first week. (I’m in shock that Andy speaks so well, by the way. He sounds really intelligent. And amusing enough without showing that he thinks that he is.) And she told him how smart he is, when she’s the opposite! Oysh.

And how could she not have asked him why his kids never saw a tennis match?! And why do they not play? Did he try to get them to? Just a few questions that would have been great to ask when he mentioned that situation. How did she get this job? And better yet—keep it?!

Now that I just had a few minutes to calm down about all that idiocy, I can get to a few of my disparate overall observations of this years’ Wimbledon:

The players here are, of course, seeded, so they can be paired up properly against each other. (I’m explaining that for the nescients reading this.) And more seeds went out early here than ever before. I’ve never seen anything like it. Thirty-one of the sixty-four seeded players (between both genders) were out in the first three days!

Just a pair of the ladies in need of better bras. And posture! Photo by Karen Salkin.

There were sooo many females in need of better bras! Or bras, period. First of all, the young ladies do not stand-up straight, and with the bad bras, they all look so dumpy. Mr. X watched more of the tourney than ever with me, and he could not believe how awful the majority of them looked. Also, since the girls are all incredible athletes, one would assume that they would have low body fat, which looked to be far from the case.

They now allow women to wear different-colored shorts under their dresses, instead of the usually-required all-white. (Wow—three hyphenated terms in one sentence!!!)  Can you figure-out why? I think I have. It’s to make them less self-conscious if they have their periods!!! I’m pretty sure of it. And…good idea!

Favorites, (but who didn’t win,) Aryna Sabalenka and Carlos Alcaraz are both so charming. That’s really why I root for them, more than for their athletic prowess.

Carlos Alcaraz, grabbing a water bottle to rush over to a spectator in need. Photo by Karen Salkin.

When a spectator needed a bit of medical attention on the first very hot day, Carlos Alcaraz went and got a bottle of water to give to the people working on the heat-affected person! In the middle of the all-important fifth set! Not just because of this incident, but Carlos is one of the most genuinely nice people in sports. (Aryna did the same thing a few days later, along with ice, and she did it at the most dramatic moment in the semifinals for herself. And the ice she gave was an ice pack that she was using to cool her own face down! And she had to walk all the way across the court and the heat to do it. I told you she’s a good girl.)

She also said the cutest and most amusing thing during one of her post-match on-court interviews. The interviewer asked what she thought of all the upsets, to which she answered, “I hope it’s no upsets anymore in this tournament.  I mean if you know what I mean!” That means that she was hoping that she would win the whole thing, because if she lost at any point, being seeded #1, it would be an upset.

Aryna Sabalenka’s adorbs strawberries and cream bracelet. And good green nails! Photo by Karen Salkin.

Her Wimbledon bracelet, with adorbs tiny strawberries and pearls as the cream, is the cutest thing I ever saw! So not only is Aryna a Majors Champion, she’s now also a jewelry champ!

Eventual Gentlemen’s Champion, Jannick Sinner, is also a good guy. When he won in the quarters only because Grigor Dmitrov had to retire with that pec injury, he did the post-match interview only for the purpose of praising Grigor!

Alcaraz’s first match here was Italian player Fabio Fognini’s last match ever! And it was a great one.  I loved seeing opponents laughing together and having fun.

I like Ben Shelton, but he needs to stop picking his fingers while being interviewed. Or ever!

But I love that Ben mentioned that so many people he loves are there in his box! And most are his family—father, mother, and sister. We should all have a son like that!

Why would British guy Cam Norrie not dye that crazy big gray streak in the front of his hair???

Poor Brit Oliver Tarvet had to play Alcaraz here, and he hadn’t lost a match since November!  He’s in college in the U.S., this was his Majors debut, he needed a Wild Card to get into just the Qualifying, and here he was at Centre Court playing Carlos!!! This is one situation I can truly say is amazing!

Marketa Vondrousova’s odd tats. Photo by Karen Salkin.

Marketa Vondrousova has the worst arm tattoos I’ve ever seen. They look like a kid just drew squiggles on them, with a weak pen, to boot!

Teen-ager Mirra Andreeva’s reaction to seeing Roger Federer “in real life” was adorbs. But get in line, honey!

Some of the commentators were mentioning their fave tennis players, so Patrick McEnroe said, “And my favorite is my brother,” referring to John McEnroe. So cute.

Carlos said, “Tennis is really a mental sport. How you talk to yourself is really important.” I say that’s a lesson for all life.

I give Fabio Fognini soooo much credit. He lost in the first round to Alcaraz, but then came back for his fellow Italian Flavio Cobolli’s quarterfinal match against Novak Djokovic!!!

And I give Cobolli credit for hanging in there with Novak!

Throughout the tourney, the ESPN people kept discussing mental health, which is good to talk about. But I thought that I was going to go mental if I heard about the players’ mental health any more!!!

On that topic, I am now very worried about Sasha Zverev. He was the #3 seed, but lost in the first round. And then in his press conference, he said he feels very alone. And his father and brother are his coaches, so he always has people who love him! It’s so sad. I hope someone helps him, and soon.

On the other hand, Naomi Osaka, who has always suffered with her mental health, just seems like a bitter woman these days.  Her constant screaming and missing her tosses is so rude to her opponents.  She needs to get it together or just stop competing again.

Chris Evert said about mental health, “It’s very important to have a balanced life.” I hope the players heed her wise words.

Chris Fowler and John McEnroe being devastated for Grigor Dmitrov while calling the match in which Grigor tore his pec muscle. I’m sure we all felt the same. Photo by Karen Salkin.

Now to the Semis and Finals:

Thirty-eight-year-old Novak Djokovic has hung in there on the tour only because he’s desperate to win what would be his record-breaking twenty-fifth Major! But, with Alcaraz and Sinner in his way, it’s highly unlikely that that will ever happen. He was a shadow of his old self in the Semis against Sinner, losing in straight sets. With his truly beautiful children at home, and many charitable works, I think he should give it up already. I wonder if his long-suffering wife agrees with me.

The Ladies Final was a true humiliation for runner-up Amanda Anisomova. At least she made over a million dollars for the appearance. So maybe she can take some more tennis lessons. (Too soon?) (Or she could buy her mom a manicure—she had just flown in that morning, but her nails were beyond a mess! Petty of me to mention it, I know.)

The champagne cork landing right near Sinner’s feet! Photo by Karen Salkin.

But Amanda’s concession speech was great! I’m so impressed that she did so well. Good for her. But she should have ended with, “I’m going to take my team out for more bagels now.” (She didn’t win even one game in the Final, which means she got “bagled!”)

With new Champion Iga Swiatek’s stunning victory, everybody is going to start eating her nauseating fave dish, pasta and strawberries with yogurt!

During the Gentlemen’s Final, someone popped a champagne bottle in the middle of the match, and the cork flew onto the court! Just as Sinner was serving. Now I truly have seen everything in tennis.

And lastly, I hate that Princess Kate, who presents the Championship trophies, doesn’t acknowledge every ball kid as she arrives on court. I know that it’s tradition to do it that way, but it’s a terrible policy.

Princess Kate greeting the ball kids on only one side! Photo by Karen Salkin.

Okay, that’s it for this year’s Wimbledon. I wish that my two Faves, Alcaraz and Sabalenka, had won, but I’m happy with, and for, Sinner and Swiatek. Now on to the US Open next month! I need that time to calm down. And sharpen my fangs for the occasion!

I wasn’t planning on writing about the first week of this Major tennis tournament, but it’s all been so juicy that I’m compelled to weigh-in. So here are some of my random thoughts on the proceedings:

Taylor Fritz’s creepy fake-faced girlfriend and that creepy woman who I assume is her mother. (Taylor’s head is on the lower right.) Photo by Karen Salkin.

When I decided to write this, my very first thought was how creepy hunched-over Taylor Fritz is. But he’s not nearly as bad as his nauseating, plastic-faced girlfriend! (And that even worse-looking fish-pouted loudmouth older woman, who I assume is her mother, is the worst of them!) I root against him all the time just so that I don’t have to see those females anymore.

As I tweeted last week, (@MajorCelebrity,) there must be an Olympics tennis curse! For the males, at least. All three men’s medalists in Paris—Novak Djokovic, Carlos Alcaraz, and Lorenzo Musetti—lost early in this US Open, (Carlos in the second round, the other two in the third round,) and within twenty-four hours of each other! Wow. Just wow. I’m assuming they were all exhausted from that extra physicality and stress just a few weeks earlier.

This is the first time since 2002 that none of the “Big Three,” (Roger Federer, Rafa Nadal, and Novak Djokovic,) has won a title at the Majors! What a changing of the guards.

But I predict that Novak will keep plugging on until he wins a record-setting one more. And by the way, he now has the distinction of being the earliest-eliminated defending US Open Men’s Champion since 2000.

The Olympics tennis medalists. (L-R) Carlos Alcaraz, Novak Djokovic, and Lorenzo Musetti.

One of the most jaw-dropping moments was unknown Clara Burel’s comeback from nine games to none down against former Champion here, Sloane Stephens. Of further interest in Clara’s saga was Victoria Azarenka’s subsequent win over her, which Vida did while suffering a blinding migraine, (which, unfortunately for me, I’ve had a few years experience with, so I know she meant it when she said she could not see the ball!)

The always-entertaining Gael Monfils made me laugh out loud when he took a bow after winning a particularly dramatic point in the second round against Casper Ruud.

Pam Shriver, doing an on-camera interview! Photo by Karen Salkin.

I could not believe how absolutely schleppy commentator Pam Shriver looked one day when she was conducting on-court interviews with players after their victories. As I tweeted, I guess she didn’t know that she was going to be on TV that day. She looked like a ragamuffin who just ran out of the stands onto the court!

Here it is, years after I first begged ESPN tennis host Chris McKendry to stop saying “sawL” and “drawL” for “saw” and “draw,” (which are only two of her many speaking errors,) via *Twitter, yet the creepy woman still inexplicably adds an “L” onto the ends of those words! *(Instead of taking my correction to heart, and learning from it, since she was obviously absent in school that day—and ever since!—she…blocked me! That made me laugh.)

If anyone knows why the singer-actor Leon, (who played David Ruffin in the mini-series about The Temptations,) is always in Coco Gauff’s box, and/or why Station 19’s Boris Kodjoe is in Frances Tiafoe’s, I beg of you to let me know the reason, in the Comments below.

Coco Gauff was a terrible sport at Wimbledon, even yelling at her coaches. She was also a bad sport at the Olympics, and in an early round here when she appeared to be losing.

Botic van de Zandschulp’s miniscule celebration after beating Novak Djokovic! Photo by Karen Salkin.

It was so rude of commentator Chris Evert to implore the crowd, (who listen to the broadcasts through special free headphones in their seats,) to cheer for Coco to get her going against Elina Svitolina, (who is one of the kindest most well-liked people in tennis!) The spectators that day didn’t really seem to care about Coco, and Elina was winning, but the sudden crazy cheering for Coco seemed to rattle Elina and she wound-up losing. Shame.

Botic van de Zandschulp, (whose last name, of course, none of the ESPN people can pronounce, except for grown-up South African Cliff Drysdale,) beat Novak Djokovic, one of the three favorites to win the whole thing, without screaming or pumping his fists or telling the crowd to cheer for him even once! And when he came away with that enormous win, he just gave a minuscule fist pump to his team, without making Novak feel bad about his brutal defeat. I wish everyone was like that. That’s basically how Roger Federer always was, which is just a part of the reason he’s still The Stranger I Love Most.

Brad Gilbert looking ill on camera. Photo by Karen Salkin.

Late Friday night, ESPN commentator Brad Gilbert looked like he had either pinkeye or, at the very least, a very bad cold. He always mispronounces words and players’ names, so him saying “PRopyrin” for “Popyrin” and “SundRay” for “Sunday” weren’t clues to his health, but his eyes were very red and he was also coughing and choking. He should not have been near his colleagues. Or he should have at least explained to the viewing audience that all of that apparent un-wellness was due to something else, like an allergy.

The schedule at the US Open is always so unfair. The people who play the second night matches on the main TV court are always at such a disadvantage, especially when the match before them goes long. And it’s even worse for the guys because they have the potential to go five sets, as opposed to three. On Friday night, the ladies started after midnight!!! That’s just crazy!

Quarterfinalist Emma Navarro. Photo by Karen Salkin.

The announcing team of Chris Fowler and Chris Evert were sooooo rude to Emma Navarro during her win against Coco Gauff. They were so busy blowing smoke up Coco’s butt that they completely ignored that Emma is also American, and therefore, might have fans in this “home” slam. And Emma was even born in New York!!! The constant extreme jingoism of the ESPN commentators is always pretty nauseating, but this time it was downright disgusting. Since the girls are both American, they should have given them equal treatment in their comments. They just kept lamenting that Coco was losing rather than celebrating that Emma was winning! (Near the end, they all of a sudden started trying to laud Emma. I have a feeling that ESPN was getting a bunch of angry tweets about the creepy commentating, because the duo turned on a dime. I know that I would have tweeted about it if I had been watching live! And I know firsthand that Chris Fowler is amenable to what we fans have to say; a few years ago, I tweeted to him that something he said was not right in some way, and he wrote right back that I was correct and he was sorry about it.) And now that she’s in the Quarterfinals, those ESPN peeps will be gushingly on the Emma bandwagon.

I love that new-ish play-by-play guy, Mike Monaco, corrected Rennae Stubbs on her saying “apparently” when she meant “allegedly.” I had been iffy about a new guy joining the announcing team up until that point. (And, by the way, Rennae is my favorite of that gang—she’s so honest and fair and correct about all her observations—so this is not a slam on her at all. I just appreciate corrections!)

Donna Vekic always looks like she’s losing. It’s not fun to watch.

Karolina Muchova. Photo by Karen Salkin.

I really like Karolina Muchova, but why is she fashioning her shorts like a diaper? Her clothing sponsor cannot be happy about that little peccadillo.

Young Russian Diana Shnaider has been wearing a headscarf the entire time. I had never seen her before, so the look was shocking at first; I immediately felt terrible because I thought she had cancer. But it turns-out there’s a strange story to it, which I can semi relate to. Her parents made her wear hats or visors when she was little because her hair and skin are so fair, and they wanted to protect her from the sun. She’s twenty now, so she can decide whether or not to continue that very odd-looking practice, but she says she’s the most comfortable with a *schmata on her head. *(My word, not hers.) So she now has them custom-made! (Although no one can tell that from looking at them.)

So here’s my own story pertaining to her look: When I was little, after my hair was just washed, my mother made me wear…underpants on my head! To not get a cold from wet hair. Oysh. But at least I didn’t wear it in front of fans and TV audiences of millions, as Diana does!

Diana Shnaider. Photo by Karen Salkin.

Here’s an addendum to my experience: When I was in my 20s, and I guess considered somewhat hot, a good friend had a new boyfriend she wanted me to meet. But when she called to say that they were on their way over, she requested that I not look good that night. So all I could think to do on such short notice was to—you guessed it—put underwear on my head, like in the old days. And I’m not talking about cute or sexy ones, either. That couple has been married for decades now, but still, every time I see them, the husband mentions that that’s what I looked like the first time he ever saw me! So I guess it worked—he’s never seen me as attractive!

And lastly, as a former chubster myself, (throughout my life and as lately as a year ago,) I’m politically allowed to say this: I’m very surprised by how many hefty girls can play this game at such a high level! One of them even has got to be over two hundred pounds! Yet she can run around the court like someone half a body lighter! I do not get it. But more power to them. I think it’s wonderful that tennis accommodates so many different body types.

With the weird Paris Olympics tennis competition, (which is actually always a tad odd,) behind us, preceded by a somewhat different Wimbledon, (except for the male and female champs, Carlos Alcaraz and Barbora Krejcikova, both of whom I was happy with,) which included Andy Murray’s retirement tribute, (which my beloved Roger Federer went to England for, but then couldn’t be a part of because they changed the date or time,) we’ve finally arrived at the final Major tournament of the year—the U.S. Open.

2024 Wimbledon Champions, Carlos Alcaraz and Barbora Krejcikova, at their Champions Dinner after that tournament in July.

As always, I’m grateful for any opportunity to lay my eyes on the gorgeous Matteo Berrettini, after he did not qualify for the Paris Olympics due to his low ranking this year due to injury. But he’s on the way back! (From my mouth to God’s ears!) So let’s go, Italian Stallion!

So much seems to have changed in the world of tennis in 2024, (as I mentioned above, Andy Murray retiring, and also poor Rafa Nadal being only a shadow of his former self, and therefore, not competing at the Open,) but a few other parts have stayed the same, (such as creepy Novak Djokovic still being at the top of the game, much to my annoyance.)

Photo by Victor Villegas, of the 2022 US Open, as is the one at the top of this page.

I’m also soooo sick of the women’s defending champ here, Coco Gauff. I was never a fan of hers to begin with, (except when her fifteen-year-old self beat the pants off Venus Williams at Wimbledon five years ago,) but now she’s just proving herself to be a consistent bad sport, mainly by arguing with umpires over calls and also by not being gracious to her opponents at the net when she’s defeated.

Iga Świątek. Photo by Victor Villegas.

And World #1 Iga Świątek of Poland is sort-of doing the same as Coco recently, to a lesser level. When she lost shockingly, (in the third round!,) at Wimbledon last month, instead of praising her opponent, she said, “After [the French Open,] I didn’t really rest properly; I’m not going to make this mistake again.” (I honestly think she was talking about that she had gone to the Taylor Swift concert during the few days between the two tournaments.)

And then I just watched Aryna Sabalenka make mincemeat out of both her last two opponents—Iga in the semis, and then Jessica Pegula in the Final—of the pre-Open Cincinnati Open last week. And she looked pretty unbeatable. But you never know. Just look at that almost-unknown Zheng Qinwen, (but she is #7 now,) of China winning the Gold at the Olympics just a few weeks ago!

I always root for Elina Svitolina, not just because she’s married to charming Gael Monfils, and I love that family unit, but mainly because of her wonderful and touching devotion to her home country of Ukraine. She uses most of her time and tennis earnings to help her people, which is beyond admirable.

Jannik Sinner. Photo by Victor Villegas.

On top of all that, there are some troubling first round matches for the ladies, such as Jasmine Paolini v. Bianca Andreescu, Naomi Osaka v. Jelena Ostapenko, and Emma Raducanu v. Sofia Kenin, the last five of them all Majors winners!!! All half dozen of those women deserve to make it to at least the quarter-final; however half of them will be out right at the beginning of the tournament! Shame.

On the men’s side, we have a bit of a controversy brewing regarding World #1 Jannik Sinner. He tested positive for a banned substance…twice! Yet the International Tennis Integrity Authority decided to not suspend him, and rather to believe his explanation for the incidents. And that is that he got it into his system accidentally because his physiotherapist had it on his own hands when he gave Jannik a massage. It was such a tiny amount that it is very possible that’s how it happened, but many people in and around the sport feel that that grace would not have been extended to lower-ranked players.

Matteo Berrettini. Photo by Victor Villegas.

I never root for him anyway, unless he’s playing against Djokovic, so I’m on the fence about the entire situation. For now. (Only because I have so much else to worry about in the world at this present time.) But I’m, of course, keeping my eyes on Matteo Berrettini, (even when he’s off the court!,) and on the two new French dudes, Arthur Fils and 6’8” Giovanni Mpetshi Perricard, whose serve almost no one can return! (And whose two-word last name almost none of the commentators and analysts get right!)

I also always like to see the colorful fashions of the US Open, even moreso this year after all the obligatory whites of Wimbledon followed by the de rigueur national colors at the Olympics.

As always, I’ll post my live thoughts on all the proceedings on Twitter, @MajorCelebrity. I hope you’ll join me there in seeing how it all unfolds.

So what that means, basically, is…do not disturb me for the next fortnight!!!

The weird thing is that the heyday of tennis is essentially over for me. The Stranger I Love Most, Roger Federer, retired a couple of years ago. So long ago in tennis years, in fact, that a documentary about his last season of playing just came out! Nothing says “it’s over” more than a long-form video history.

How beautiful is this place?!

And even though I hated that he had such talented rivals, it’s getting to the end of the road now for Rafa Nadal and Novak Djokovic, as well. Due to continuing injuries, Rafa isn’t playing in this Wimby tourney; he tried to make a comeback, of sorts, from years of injuries, at last month’s French Open, only to lose in…the first round!!! Of the Grand Slam tournament that he’s won a record fourteen times!!! And Novak actually got injured there in a tough five-set win, and had to undergo knee surgery just a couple of days later! I think they’re learning that getting old is not fun. For anyone, except kids.

But, shockingly, (especially to me, who has actually had two knee surgeries, both because of dancing,) Djokovic is competing at Wimbledon again! And as the #2 seed! I don’t think he has a chance of winning, but it’s still pretty amazing that he’s going to chance playing, just three and a half weeks post-surgery. Wow.

And let’s spare a thought for former Champion, Britain’s Andy Murray. I believe he’s announced that this will be his last Wimbledon, and possibly last pro tournament ever, so it should be very emotional to see him walk on, (and even moreso, off,) the court. Let’s all enjoy him as much as possible now.

With the unlikeable Williams sisters finally gone, there are not even any females to hate anymore! I’m not a fan of young American, Coco Gauff, nor of Latvian perennial bad sport, Jeļena Ostapenko. But that’s it. I like some girls more than others, but I’m not a crazed fan of anyone. I’ve rooted for Ons Jabeur for the past few years, but I have to admit that I am getting a tad tired of her intense strong-fist-motion celebration after every point she wins. Enough already.

So, now it’s all about the young guns, of both genders, but I rarely root for one of them over another.

On a side note, I dislike that the players are allowed to get coached from the stands nowadays.

Just a small part of the Wimbledon crowd.

But I love sports so much, and tennis, in particular, that I’m still going into self-imposed exile today, and for the following two weeks.

No worries, though—I’ll still be publishing my semi-weekly columns during that time. Perhaps even about the goings-on at Wimbledon! I’m sure that someone there will piss me off, not least of which the commentators, especially that female host who still has no idea how to correctly pronounce “draw” and “Murray!” I’m getting upset just thinking about that stupidity right now. But oh well—let the tennis begin!

I just hope that nice people win and everyone will be safe.

And, of course, I’ll be tweeting, @MajorCelebrity, some of my more important thoughts on it all as the tournament goes along. So if you don’t already follow me, this will be a great time to begin. I’ll meet you over there as soon as I something fun, (or snarky,) to say about the proceedings.

The US Open was a somewhat strange tourney this year.  There was a new Women’s Champion for the ninth year in a row, and three of the four Men’s semi-finalists were previous champions, including the last two.  (Carlos Alcaraz last year and Daniil Medvedev the one before.) And there was a crazy almost-hour-long social protest in the stands that held-up the first women’s semi-final. (But Coco Gauff‘s good reaction to it, saying she believes in social warming, as well–which all normal people do–I actually liked her for the first time.)

Coco Gauff on the protest that happened during her semi-final.

This 2023 US Open just might be the thing to finally stop my sports-watching obsession, though. I could not be more disappointed with the results, in both the Men’s and Women’s competitions, if I tried! I was wishing that anybody would have won those titles other than the two who did!

So before I say anything else, let me tell you why I rooted against both winners during the entire two weeks.

American teen-ager Coco Gauff seems okay enough, but I like all the other contenders, (outside of creepy Jelena Ostapenko,) more than her. There are so many incredible human interest stories in the field that I can’t help but root for others. For example, my favorite female player, Elina Svitolina, is not only from Ukraine, but helps her country all the time, with both money and moral aid. And, she just had a baby in October!!! And she’s already back playing professionally, and doing quite well, to boot. And she’s married to adorable and hilarious player, Gael Monfils, so I always love to watch those two as long as possible.

My favorite sports couple–Elina Svitolina and Gael Monfils.

Then there’s Tunisian Ons Jabeur, who’s the highest-ranked African and Arab tennis player in history! More importantly, she’s considered to be one of the nicest players ever. And she played all four of her rounds here with the flu!!! What grit and determination she showed.

There were so many interesting stories here, of mothers competing, people retiring after this tournament, (like Americans John Isner and Jack Sock,) and players coming back from major injury and hardship. So I found it hard to root for a teen-ager, especially one who’s blessed with incredible athletic genes from both parents.

John Isner after his final pro tennis match.

But the main reason I root against Coco Gauff is that I’m disgusted by the ESPN commentators’ jingoistic adoration of the girl. If she was from another country, they’d barely mention her! And I have a bit of disdain for her cutesy moniker of “Coco”; her name is actually Cori, but using that would take away from the attraction of her. (But that’s the kind of name that the ESPN team is prone to like, anyway; they call each other “Chrissie” and “Pammie” and “Cliffie,” which is a tad nauseating to hear from senior citizens every few minutes.)

And I really wanted funny, entertaining, and honest Aryna Sabalenka to win the Championship. (Of the two finalists—I wanted Svitolina to win out of the whole field.) As much as I feel awful for Madison Keys to have lost in the Semi the way she did, (after winning every game in the first set,) Sabalenka was amazing in that match. To come back from as far down as she was, and win it, was a Herculean feat, one I’m glad I witnessed.

US Open Chamion Coco Gauff and the very gracious runner-up, Aryna Sabalenka.

By the way, I found Gauff’s message to her “doubters” in her Championship speech to be really nasty. People are allowed to have their opinions, and in the case of sports pundits, they’re actually paid to voice them! Since she was #6 in the world at the time, and had lost in the first round of the recent Wimbledon tournament, (to a much lower-rated American,) and had never won a Major, (while there were several Majors and Olympics Champions in the draw,) and she was playing the new World #1, it was perfectly reasonable to think she wasn’t going to win this title, either. There was no need to scold people who thought that someone else would win it.

And a word of caution to her, to not let this first win go to her head. There have been other recent teen winners of the US Open, (also-nineteen-year-old Canadian Bianca Andreescu in 2019, who beat Serena Williams!, and also has a nickname—Bibi—but doesn’t feel the need to use it instead of her real name, as Coco does; and then-eighteen-year-old Brit, Emma Raducanu, who not only won this title as a qualifier but did not drop a set during the entire tournament!,) who have never gone on to experience any more good results since! So Coco needs to talk to herself, not people with opinions on who will win any sporting event.

My beloved Roger Federer in 2022, at the Rod Laver event where he retired from professional tennis. I take every chance to laud him again!

On the men’s side, I really dislike Novak Djokovic. At first, I just didn’t want him to pass my beloved Roger Federer, The Stranger I Love Most. (On an amusing side note, I had once told my fabulous female gynecologist about my love for him. So when I saw her recently, and mentioned him again, she told me to just fantasize about him! Ew. I don’t have even a modicum of a crush on him!!! I just love him as a person and an endlessly classy public figure, who has never put a foot wrong! So I hope that you all realize what my admiration of him rightly is.)

Getting back to Novak, I used to occasionally like him, like when he did impressions of the other players’ quirky serves. But now, he’s basically an unlikeable d**k. He’s always wanted to be popular like Roger Federer and Rafael Nadal are, and he’s clearly bitter that he’s not.  And never will be.

But now at the Open, he did the most unsportsmanlike thing I’ve ever seen any player do in my entire life. It was actually shocking. He had just beaten young American Ben Shelton in their Semi-Final, which, very surprisingly, Ben had made. When Ben wins a match, he looks at his team in his player’s box, (not at his opponent he had just beaten,) and does a quick miming motion of making a call and then hanging the phone down, (not in an angry way,) which is his cute shout-out to his fellow Florida State college athletes, (including one who’s a World Champion track star.) It’s just a low-key little celebration for the twenty-year-old that he is.

Djokovic’s shockingly rude mocking of young American Ben Shelton.

Well, when a-hole Djokovic beat Ben in the semis, Novak imitated Shelton’s signature move as he walked to the net to shake hands! But he slammed the imaginary phone down! I’ve never ever seen that particular rudeness before. No one else would even think of doing something like that!

No commentator, nor Djokovic himself, had an explanation for his extreme rudeness to another player, especially one who has never done anything wrong to him. And then, as if that disrespect wasn’t enough, Novak did not applaud for Ben as he walked off the court! In all my years decades of intense tennis-watching, I have never ever seen rudeness like that. So now I’m going back to detesting the jerk.

Ben was classy in his post-match press conference. When asked about Novak mocking him, the young guy, (whose dad was also a pro tennis player, so he’s been around the sport his entire life,) actually stuck-up for Novak, (probably because he felt he had to,) saying, “I didn’t see it until after the match. I don’t like when I’m on social media and I see people telling me how I can or can’t celebrate. If you win the match, you deserve to do whatever you want. As a kid growing up, I always learned that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.” Good ending to that statement, Ben! You go, boy!

Novak Djokovic gratuitously showing his tee shirt that he hopes will link him to Kobe Bryant.

There’s one more thing that Djokovic did that annoyed me—his supposed “tribute” to Kobe Bryant when he won the tournament was downright gratuitous and exploitative; it was just an attempt to get cheers from the crowd. And love from everyone who was a fan of Kobe. It had nothing whatsoever to do with Novak’s win at the Open, nor his tennis career in general! He was hitching himself to Kobe’s wagon because he had just won his twenty-fourth Major title, and Kobe’s jersey number was twenty-four. What a stretch. He wanted everyone to say how wonderful he was to “pay tribute” to Kobe in that moment, and all the sports and news outlets fell for it. How could they not, actually? They all love to get in any mention of the basketball great that they can. It’s just one more shameful act on the part of the desperate-for-love tennis player.

On a much happier note now, to explain a little of why I love this sport, there’s so much more to many of these players than meets the eye. For example, Russian Andrei Rublev not only has his own clothing line, but he speaks fluent Spanish to his coaching team, because they’re all Spanish. And his countrymen, Daniil Medvedev, speaks fluent French to his coach who’s French. Some of these players speak five languages!

I wish ALL sportsmen would be as good to each other as fellow tennis players Daniil Medvedev and Andrei Rublev are!

But ESPN needs me to restructure things for them. I’ve given up trying to make the host Chris McKendry stop saying “sawL” and “drawL” for “saw” and “draw,” (among so many other speaking errors she makes,) because that’s just a thankless task at this point.

But the “panels” need to start discussing the interesting news each day; it’s so frustrating for them to ignore what’s been happening the day or night before. All they discuss, ad nauseam I must add, is the Americans who win. If one of them loses, they’re never mentioned again. The commentators need to give us the latest on injuries and illnesses. For example, gorgeous Italian Matteo Berrettini, about whom they always spoke when he was doing well a couple of years ago, twisted his ankle really badly in an early round, and had to retire from his match. And they never said even one more word about him the entire tournament!!! Disgraceful.

And I know that the players give them a list of the people in their guest boxes, but the match-callers rarely impart that info to the viewers. We’d really love to be in on the competitors’ personal lives—that would bring so much more interest to the audience!

And enough with the jingoism; we all care about players other than just Americans. They can cover them a bit more, if they like, but not like they do now.

The great Arthur Ashe, after whom the US Open main court is now named, when he won the 1968 US Open.

Worst of all is that, even though they did mention the great Arthur Ashe a few times in the entire two weeks of coverage of which I viewed every single second, they did not make the fuss I feel he deserves. Saturday, September 9, was the anniversary of Arthur winning the very first US Open of the Open Era, which is a major big deal. How did they not commemorate that?! Especially because he was the first black player to do so, and now here was Gauff, a young black player herself, book-ending that achievement! And they were playing all the Finals on none other than…Arthur Ashe Stadium!!! Just another reason why ESPN needs me to run the show for them.

Lastly, I apologize to everyone for not doing even one tweet during the proceedings. I just had to go out to an event, (sports-related, of course,) on the very first night of the tourney, which made me always be hours behind in watching all the TV coverage. That meant that my tweets would not be timely. Plus, I was never on the computer that entire fortnight because I didn’t want to learn of any results by accident. I kept thinking that I’d catch-up and then tweet my thoughts out, but it just never happened, no matter how little sleep I got.

So I’ll try again for the next big event, which was supposed to be the Emmys this week, but our SAG strike put an end to it. However, there always seems to be something else right around the corner, doesn’t there? And if I can bear it, football season is already here now. (I guess my sports self-ban didn’t last very long.)

I’ve been so busy with other aspects of my life recently that I haven’t had much time to pay attention to most of the previews for the 2023 US Open tennis tournament, which starts today, of course. (Duh—just look at the heading of this article!)

This is from an earlier tournament this summer, but it depicts what I hope for all tennis events–lovely camaraderie! That’s American Tommy Paul on the left and Spain’s Carlos Alcaraz on the right, walking back to the court together after a rain delay. I’ve never seen that before. The players usually keep their distance from one another and never walk together, no less chat and smile and laugh along the way!

Ergo, I don’t have anything earth-shattering to report on for the beginning of it.

But I just want to acknowledge the venerable tourney, as I always do. So I’m sharing just a few disparate thoughts on what we might see there. Here they are, as they occurred to me right now:

~ I love that, in addition to having electronics make the in and out calls, which eliminates all the errors by human line judges, and makes challenges obsolete, (so players don’t need to decide to use the few they were allotted,) this year the US Open will also feature a Video Review System. That will come into play for things other than line calls, such as if a ball bounced more than once, and the dreaded foot faults. I’ve always been a fan of fairness, (except the occasional time I could actually see out of the eye mask for Pin the Tail on the Donkey when I was a kid,) so this new innovation is right up my alley!

~ I hope that Ons Jabeur, who is now #5 in the world, finally wins a Major, which the US Open is one of a quartet of them. (In case you’re not a big tennis follower, the others are Wimbledon, the Australian Open, and the French Open, which is also known as Roland-Garros.) She’s been in three Finals in the past baker’s dozen months, including this one last year, and deserved to win the two Wimbledon ones, so I’m praying this is her time.

~ And even more fervently, I hope that Novak Djokovic does not win another one!!!

Elina Svitolina and Gael Monfils off the court. What a beautiful couple!

~ I’m far from jingoistic, but it will be interesting to see if the Americans can continue their recent good runs. Jessica Pegula and Tommy Paul both recorded wins over the World #1s this summer, which is amazing, (a word I use for only its true meaning, and not like all the idiots of the world do!)

~ I love that married couple Gael Monfils and Elina Svitolina play with their wedding rings on. And she even wears her big engagement ring!!! I can’t do anything while rocking jewelry except just look fabulous!!! (If I do say so myself, which happens most likely all of the time.)

Carlos Alcaraz in July…

…and Carlos now. How much better does he look with that haircut and a shave???

~ Thank goodness Men’s World #1, young Spaniard Carlos Alcaraz, finally had his awful hair trimmed and styled! And he also shaved the back and the sides of it! He looks a zillion times better. Now he just needs invisible braces, and we’ll be all set in a year or two.

~ Recently, World #1 woman, Iga Swiatek, made it known that she was unhappy with the “amount of hate and criticism that” she and her team receive if she even loses the rare set. She very wisely, gently, and kindly wanted to “encourage people to be more thoughtful when they comment on the Internet.” I’m soooo with her! I’m always grateful that there was no social media when I was doing my TV show! Even though 99% of my fan mail and phone messages—and media stories!–were positive, there were always a few jealous trolls out there who tried to bring me down. So I can just imagine how awful I would have felt with those people being able to comment publicly every second of every day! And that’s what Iga and many others, (including vocal-against-the-meanies-of-the-world Nick Kyrgios,) are going through right now. Horrible.

Iga Swiatek having some fun on Fan Day.

~ Speaking of Nick, he’s sitting this one out with an injury again, making it a clean sweep of the 2023 Majors that he’ll miss. What a shame for him, and even moreso, for us fans! I guess it will be left to Monfils to pick-up the slack in the entertainment department. [Note: I was invited to a special professional tennis tournament in LA a few weeks ago, but I didn’t plan my schedule well, so I missed it. The invitation said that both Nick and Gael would be there competing, but I never found-out if either of those injured men did show-up. If they were there, I’m even more depressed that I missed the event than I already was before I knew!]

Chris Eubanks, looking like the grown-up commentator that he sometimes is.

~ Perhaps the happiest person there will be previously-to-Wimbledon unknown American, Chris Eubanks, (who I told you about before that tournament, where I rightly predicted he was one to watch, which you can still read here: itsnotaboutme.tv/news/tennis-wimbledon-2023-begins-today.) I’m also happy because Chris is now seeded here at the US Open!!! (He’s #28 or #32, which is an amazing accomplishment for him.)

~ I also always root for Daniil Medvedev, who is seeded third here. He’s funny and charming and intelligent and abundantly fun to watch play his crazy brand of tennis!

~ Caroline Wozniacki is back playing professional tennis, (at thirty-three years of age!,) after retiring in January of 2020, and having two children, including one just nine months ago!!! That is sooo impressive. She’s doing so after a year of commentating for ESPN, which just might be why she caught the bug again, seeing so many competitors she feels she’s better than. (And just might be.) I’m happy for her.

And for us, the listeners. Mr. X walked into the room when she was commentating during Wimbledon, and asked if “that woman” had just “woken up,” because her voice and slow, low speech sound like she had. So we’d both much rather watch her play than listen to her speak.

I have to be honest, and say I never much cared for her, (perhaps because she’s the first person I had ever heard start every sentence with “I mean,” but I did feel awful for her when her former fiancé, pro golfer Rory McElroy, broke up with her, (on the phone no less,) right after their wedding invitations went out! So I’m thrilled about her subsequent happy marriage to way-taller former NBA player, David Lee. He must be a super-supportive husband, (and baby daddy,) to be okay with her still following her dream at this late stage.

John Isner and his beautiful fam–the perfect reason to retire now and enjoy being hands-on as his kids grow-up!!!

~ And a major congrats to giant American John Isner, who is playing his last pro tourney here. He’s given us tons of fun through the years, (remember that marathon match against Nicolas Mahut at Wimbledon in 2010?,) and he holds the record for the most aces ever (14,391 right now), so he deserves to relax a bit now. (I just hope that if he becomes a broadcaster, he works to banish his lisp; it’s hard to listen to a lot in a row.)

~ Jack Sock, the Men’s Doubles Champion here in 2018, just announced yesterday that he, too, is retiring after this US Open, but his reasons appear to be very different from John’s. It seems that John, (with whom Jack is playing Doubles here, making that discipline a fun one to watch,) is leaving the pro side of the sport to spend more time with his young family. So guess what Jack, (who won the 2016 Olympics in Mixed Doubles!,) is planning on doing now? He’s going to be playing professional…pickleball!!! Wow. I think that will suit his high energy style really well. I wish the best of luck to both these guys.

The crowds at the US Open!

~ That’s it for now, so I can start watching the proceedings already, but I will still try to tweet, (or whatever it’s called these days,) about the happenings in Queens for the next two weeks. So if you don’t already follow me on Twitter, this is a probably a great time to do it. I’m @MajorCelebrity, (of course.)

As miserable as I was when Roger Federer, The Stranger I Love Most, officially retired from competitive tennis ten months ago, he actually wound-up doing me a slight favor. Here’s why: I always watch every second of Wimbledon–I repeat, every second–of the wonderful tournament, but this year I really don’t have that kind of time. Right in the middle of the tennis extravaganza are baseball’s Home Run Derby and All-Star Game, the ESPYs Awards show, several play opening nights, and a couple of gifting events, not to mention even doctor and dentist appointments! So, without Roger playing Wimbledon, it will be easier to lessen my death grip on the tournament a taste. I hope.

Roger Federer in his Wimbledon glory days.

But still, the tourney begins today and goes non-stop for the next two weeks. I don’t really have any dogs in this year’s race, and only one person from either side to root against. That is Novak Djokovic, of course. I don’t hate him, as many do. Rather, his success just chaps my hide; I hate that he’s won more Majors than Roger now. And his anti-vax stand disgusts me. But other than those peccadilloes, Novak is charming and intelligent. It’s actually a bit strange that most tennis fans, and the general public, just do not cotton to him. But oh well.

I’ll still watch what I can, and root for whom I perceive to be the nicest people out there, one of which is Ons Jabeur from Tunisia. I wish she had won it last year, when she was in the Final with a great chance, because World #1 Iga Swiatek of Poland appears to have a chokehold on the four Majors now.

I also always root for the wonderful married couple, Ukrainian Elina Svitolina and her most entertaining husband, France’s Gael Monfils, (who, sadly, had to withdraw due to a wrist injury he sustained at the French Open last month,) along with gorgeous Matteo Berrettini from Italy, and the most colorful player I’ve ever had the pleasure to witness, Aussie Nick Kyrgios. (But, again sadly, he withdrew just yesterday, due to a wrist injury, as well. My favorite men are dropping like flies! This tourney will really miss the two most entertaining players ever!!!)

Elina Svitolina and Gael Monfils, having their usual fun time.

I’m also a big fan of Czechs Karolina Plishkova and lovely Petra Kvitova. And I root for intense Viktoria Azarenka, who’s semi-reviled now because she’s from Belarus. Last year, athletes from that country and Russia weren’t allowed to play in this tournament, but now they can, as long as they’re listed as being from basically nowhere. On the men’s side, kooky Daniil Medvedev, from “nowhere,” as well, (because he’s Russian,) is always fun to watch, on so many levels.

And we Americans have two men, Taylor Fritz and Frances Tiafoe, in the Top 10 for the first time in over eleven years! That’s something to root for during the Fourth of July holiday. And in that vein, keep an eye on Chris Eubanks, another young American who is now up to being #43 in the world, although few have heard of him outside of the tennis world. He could turn-out to be a great Wimby story.

New(ish)comer Chris Eubanks.

Now, nothing to do with the actual competition, but I loved seeing Roger Federer do some sort of exhibition at Wimbledon recently, with the ball kids and Princess Kate!!! I don’t know of whom I was more jealous for playing with the other! We all know how much I adore Roger, but I admire Kate more than any other female; I’d love her to be My New Best Friend! I would have been happy to even be one of those ball kids!

Princess Kate and Roger Federer learning how to be ball kids at Wimbledon!

By the way, I’ve never mentioned this before, but I love that Wimbledon refers to the players as “ladies” and “gentlemen,” as opposed to the usual “women’s” and “men’s.” Very classy of them.

Okay, that’s it for now. I have to get started on watching the tennis already! I wish the best of luck to all who deserve it. And I’m sure we’re in for some great surprises, as always.