This was my third foray into Dark Harbor, the big Halloween event at the Queen Mary, and it just keeps getting better and better.  The VIP preview soiree had many similarities with last year’s rendition, but there were lots of new surprises, as well.  My friend Roz had accompanied me last year, and could not wait to return, if only to witness a “monster” scaring me again while I was eating, which made my plate of food land all over the floor. And all over my entire being, too!

But I was prepared this year, so the goblins were successful in their frightening of me only twice. (But that was two times too many for me!)  That’s because I brought along a bodyguard this year; Thomas really looked-out for me, which I appreciate.  (But the monsters were successful in scaring him a time or two, as well, so ha!)

The gathering in the RIP Lounge. Photo by Karen Salkin.

Shortly after my trio arrived at the Dark Harbor location in front of the Queen Mary, we three headed up to the RIP Lounge for the evening’s dinner party.  It was once again an all-you-can-eat taco bar, presented right on the walkway above the ship.  (The attraction’s literature refers to it as a “taco bar,” but the people serving us asked me to refer to it as a “fajita bar.”  I think that’s because there were soft tortillas as opposed to hard shells, but it’s really all the same to me.”)  I think this one was perhaps even more delicious than last year; it featured not just the steak and chicken choices, but gorgeous grilled peppers and onions, as well.  Even though it’s unlimited, all three of us were stuffed from just one trip down the food line!  I was actually glad the line was so long that I had no patience to wait for seconds because the food was so good that I would have erroneously eaten more than I needed to!

The violin-playing monster. Photo by Karen Salkin.

As we ate and mingled with some of the other guests, monsters were everywhere! One was a female violinist who was serenading us beautifully, and Thomas said that that was the best part of the dining experience. I agreed, and stated, “That isn’t scary, it’s delightful!” No sooner were the words out of my mouth than she hit the worst most horrible notes ever, which seared my soul. But it made us laugh. And also reminded us that we were at Dark Harbor, and not some classical concert, for goodness’ sake!

One of the many aerialists. Photo by Karen Salkin.

After dinner, we spent a bit of time on the Queen Mary herself. What a vessel! But the body of the attractions is on land, in front of the ship, so this perusal was icing on the cake.

When we were done there, we walked around the grounds, looking at all the fun sights. There was tons of entertainment this year, which really added to the fun.  Everywhere we looked, there were stages that featured acrobats, or tap dancers, or musicians, or fire twirlers—you name it.  And all the performers still stayed in creepy costumes and make-up, even while dangling from on high in aerial silks!

A scary figure at the end of a maze. Photo by Karen Salkin.

Those were the acts I liked best, but Thomas mentioned two crazy ones that I missed. He said there was a guy who let people staple money onto him! Weird. Even weirder is one that I don’t even want to tell you about, but he was amazed by it, so here goes: He saw a guy who let people pull his bottom eyelids down with hooks, like the crazies they sometimes feature on America’s Got Talent. I was in a circus when I was younger, and even I never saw anything like that in person!

On a more normal note, he said the stage act he enjoyed seeing the most was one where several monsters slid around on their knees. He deemed it “amusing,” rather than scary, so I’m sorry I missed that one.

The official Dark Harbor photos that they take of each party, in front of a green screen, as they arrive. (L-R) Thomas Hazel, Karen Salkin, and Roz Wolf.

I’m glad we brought Thomas this year because Roz and I were not courageous enough to go into any of the many frightening and creative mazes, so Thom braved them alone. He said that Soulmate was “pretty crazy.” And he loved Feast, which is the new attraction this year, and it’s on the actual Queen Mary! He said it was “fun and scary at the same time,” and “kind-of creepy, in a good way.”

But, being the deep world traveler that he is, he was the most impressed with being on the ship itself, and learning the history of the Queen Mary. He told me he passed some old jail cells onboard, and, at first, he couldn’t tell if they were real or just part of the Dark Harbor experience! (I think he did ascertain that they were real, from way back in the day.)

The cabanas are the structures with the black and white pointy tops, in the middle of the pic. Photo by Karen Salkin.

I’m assuming that the main attraction for most of the visitors is the many mazes, but for us it was the private cabanas, which I believe can be rented for the evening.  This time around, instead of being almost all-enclosed as they were last year, they were open on the sides, so we could view all the goings-on while still being comfortable and even sort-of cozy. And all the while, we were being treated to fun desserts.  There was a buffet set up in each set of cabanas; on them were delicious hot beignets, crispy funnel cakes, movie containers of popcorn, and…chocolate-covered bacon!!!  I was the only one in my group brave enough to try that last one, and yes, I would have preferred my bacon and chocolate separately. But let me tell you–there’s nothing like sitting in private luxury with your pals, and being entertained on all sides, while chilling on couches, feasting on fun confections. That’s the life, even in the midst of Halloween craziness!

The refreshment table in the cabanas. Photo by Karen Salkin.

This year, (as opposed to last,) we stayed even after it was open to the public, because we were having such a good time. Everyone appeared to be having a blast!

So, if you’re also a fun-lover, who also reveres this month of scary entertainment as I do, hie yourself to the Queen Mary’s Dark Harbor. Just don’t be holding onto anything you don’t want to drop on the ground when the monsters inevitably get you!

I’m sure that many of you already know that I don’t drink. That’s not out of a danger situation; it’s because I absolutely detest the taste of alcohol! (I know—I’m blessed, right?!) But, I’m not against being in a happening bar for a soiree.

The alley leading to the entrance, which is marked by that yellow door. Photo by Karen Salkin, as is the big one at the top of the page.

So, that’s just what my friend, Alice, and I did recently for the opening of the hidden-in-downtown-LA Birds and Bees. Half the fun is getting there! I always love a “Joe sent me” kind of vibe.

It’s located at the very end of a huge parking lot downtown, downstairs, through a sort-of tunnel. The weird thing is that, despite the espionage to get there, it’s really attractive inside! I never got to the bottom of what was there before, but it must have been something nice because this place is far from the dive I was expecting! There are couches and other tables, including some high-tops. There are tons of long windows, (but don’t sit near one if it’s cold out. Alice and I were freezing! She was even eating and drinking with gloves on!)

A waitress serivng an alcoholic punch. Photo by Alice Farinas.

I don’t know who will frequent Birds and Bees during normal business hours, but the opening night crowd was attractive and even nicely-dressed! The servers were dressed-up, as well, but instead of the little black dresses you usually see in cocktail lounges, they were attired in weird flowered dresses and red lipstick. I guess it was supposed to be an homage to some throwback era, but not one I recognized. Still, they looked nice. And were nice, which is of the most importance to me!

I can’t tell you about the actual cocktails because we didn’t have any, but everyone else seemed happy enough.

And this bar is smart enough to know how irresponsible it is to allow people to drink with nothing in their stomachs to soak it up! (Since I don’t drink, I never even realized the danger people were in with no food at all in the hip-hop clubs I was in charge of back in the day! We always went to “breakfast” when the clubs closed, but in the meantime, at least three hundred people a night were driving in the middle of the night after drinking for several hours, with no snacks even!!! How crazy was that?!)

A colorful veggie platter. Just look at that purple and green cauliflower!!! Photo by Karen Salkin.

So, to prevent a repeat of those days, the party provided trays of vegetables and cheeses, bowls of popcorn, and a few other assorted snacks, like nuts, breadsticks, and yummy poundcake. I could have used some real food at the dinner hours of the fete, but I’m sure my body was happy that all I consumed for the night was veggies and nuts. And ever-precious water! (Okay, okay–I did sneak a bite of the poundcake.)

I was told that, since they don’t have a kitchen, there will never be any fare of substance there, but that there will always be some fun snacks, such as the delicious popcorn we sampled that night, Chex cereal mix, and even a nightly special cake! Good enough. I think most people will go to Birds and Bees mainly to meet and mingle; you can always go out to eat at one of the many downtown eateries before or after.

So, go have fun; just please drink responsibly (if there’s even such a thing.) And if there’s a guard at the yellow entrance door, just tell him, “Karen sent me,” instead of “Joe.”

The little “show” as we entered. Photo by Karen Salkin.

I had been to the Halloween event at the Queen Mary before, but it was about ten years ago, and I don’t remember much about it. So, when I was invited it the private press preview of Dark Harbor last week, I painted my nails black and orange, threw on one of my many Halloween shirts, and topped it all off with glow-in-the-dark ghost and skeleton earrings. I love Halloween! (Can you tell?)

Since this was a private event, we did get some perks which are not afforded to the public. (Yay, us!) We began with being offered vodka shots as we entered, but I just happy with my bottled water. The “monsters,” (or whatever they’re officially called,) did a little greeting show for us, and then we moved on to a taco bar, right on the walkway above the ship.

The view from the walkway in front of the Queen Mary. Photo by Karen Salkin.

In case you haven’t read about my little mishap there yet, (it’s been on Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram,) here’s what happened: my pal, Roz, and I were sitting in big comfy chairs to eat. There were no tables, so I was holding a little “boat” with my chicken taco, and another with the guacamole and pico de gallo, on my lap. All of a sudden, one of the monsters snuck up beside me, and scared the bejesus out of me! (I had thought we were safe during this meal portion of the event. I should have known better.) Needless to say, my entire dinner went flying! It landed a bit on the floor, but most of it was on my newly-cleaned skirt, my arm, and the chair. I was a mess! One monster said she wanted to help me clean it all up, but I didn’t trust any of them at that point. I’m just praying that no one has put a video of it on-line yet, although, I do have to admit, I’m sure it looked pretty funny. Roz could not stop laughing.

Inside a spooky cabana. Photo by Karen Salkin.

The rest of the night, I walked around brandishing the plastic knife from dinner, to deter any of them from repeating the offense. I’m sure I looked like quite the lunatic. [Note: I do not suggest that you do the same. Mine was more or less a joke. And besides, for normal visitors, getting frightened there is half the fun!]

Roz and I really loved walking the grounds, though, and seeing all the fun mazes and sights. We even spent some time on the Queen Mary herself. What a vessel! (But the body of the attractions is on land, in front of the ship, which was just fine with me.) Everyone appeared to be having a blast.

Photo by Karen Salkin.

We ended the evening in a private cabana, which people can rent for the night. We were brought a tray containing lots of fun confections, including caramel corn, sprinkle-covered Oreos, marshmallow-decorated pretzels, and my fave—delicious brownies!!! What a treat all that was! (I believe you can order it while there, as well.)

We left early-ish, just as the attraction was opening to the public for the first night. And we were flabbergasted by the long line to get in! I’ve rarely had friends who are fun enough to care about Halloween, but here were tons of strangers who clearly do! (Care about Halloween—I have no idea if they have any friends.) It looks like I may have to move down to Long Beach for the month!

So, if you’re a fun-lover, who also reveres this month of scary entertainment, hie yourself to the Queen Mary Dark Harbor. Just don’t be holding onto anything you don’t want to drop on the ground when the monsters inevitably get you!

Lucia and I ventured into the interesting area near Little Tokyo last week for the opening of the bar One-Eyed Gypsy. (Luckily, there were none of those there.) This is Dana Hollister’s most eccentric place yet! The proprietor of Villains Tavern, which is in a different part of downtown than most of us are used to, and the beautiful Silver Lake eatery Cliff’s Edge, has opened a bar that the performers of Cirque Berserk would love!

The invitation promised “Cocktails, Carnival Fare, and an array of live entertainment,” and they delivered on all three. There was also good enough parking, both in a small adjacent lot and on the deserted streets in the area.

First of all, the place was so dark that Mr. X would have loved it. I’m so glad that I hadn’t bothered working on my hair that night! I could have even shown-up naked and nobody could have made-out any body flaws. (Not that there are any.)

And there were all kinds of fun areas, including two skee ball machines, that we made use of, (as competitive as I am, I’m big enough to admit that Lucia beat me by twenty points,) an old-fashioned fortune-telling machine, and a photo booth that will hopefully be up and running in the future. (So we can all see what we looked liked there, since it’s too dark to know on the spot.)

The bar and two table-seating areas are appropriately appointed. And the stage cracked me up. I had forgotten about the promise of “live entertainment,” and all of a sudden, the multi-colored curtain went up like the one at Disneyland’s America Sings exhibit, with the vintage country band, Hello Trouble, already making music. It was actually kind-of exciting to see. Their sound level was just right for the venue, as well.

On the cocktail front, there were many interesting drinks. I’m sure you all know by now that I don’t drink (because I hate the taste of all alcohol,) but Lucia was happy to oblige. Of her favorite one, she said, “The Surley Sailor, (made with rums and fruits,) was the perfect combination of sweet and tangy, and was a refreshing pick-me-up for the end of a day. It was served in beautiful colorful glasses, too.” [Note: the establishment misspelled “surly,” not I. I guess they figure it’s too dark to see the menu anyway.]

But, the most important thing to me–yes, even in a bar—is the food, of course! It was a few passed mini-treats and each one was more delicious than the one before. There were three different pizzas, including a clever Rueben one, cups of sweet potato tater tots, and flavorful sliders with caramelized onions.

But the food that intrigued me the most was a surprise–deep fried Oreos! I’ve actually never been a fan of the sandwich cookie, but I did eat them when I was younger just to separate the sides to see if I was lucky in love, or whatever that urban myth was in Brooklyn at the time. (I must have gotten the crème all on one side a lot to have been blessed with Mr. X. That’s no joke.)

I didn’t know it at the event, but when I researched deep fried Oreos, I found out that it’s a carnival food, which is just what the invite said would be featured at this fete! Who knew?! (I was even in a circus for awhile ,back in the day, and we traveled with a carnival, but I never saw them before.)

As much as I appreciated the dessert there, my respect grew as I tried to recreate them myself. Just the temperature alone was a challenge! And the consistency of theirs was perfect–chewy, and served with wonderful hot fudge sauce, which could have burned our tongues if not cooked just right. Pretty impressive for a bar!

I rarely quote press releases, but this one said, “Inspired by the traveling carnivals and fairs of the 1930’s, The One-Eyed Gypsy is Dana’s love song to the eccentric, an ode to the quirkily beautiful, and a calliope serenade to the gritty underbelly of nightlife.” She definitely succeeded in bringing her vision to life. The only thing missing was a fire-eater, and I wholly expect to see one there on my next visit. I just hope it’s at Xmas-time, so he can roast some chestnuts for us.