In these very stressful times, we all need little things to bring a smile to our faces whenever possible. I know that I sure do! To that end, I found three videos on the internet that really help me, in different ways. Yes, I know—there are plenty of things to see on every platform imaginable, but none of us should use that much time to search them out. (Nor should have the time!)

So I’m going to share my very amusing/heartwarming trio with you, in hopes that they help even one person as much as they’ve done that for me.

I’ll go in the order that I first came upon them:

RYLYN CLARK

I discovered this precious little boy, four-year-old Rylyn Clark, at the end of the pandemic. He’s singing an acapella version of Bob Marley’s Three Little Birds, (which people erroneously think is called Don’t Worry About a Thing, because those words are in the lyrics, and that’s actually the message of it,) and it stopped me in my crazy tracks. His absolute sweetness, and happiness at imparting that very necessary-at-the-moment message, had me weeping in just a few seconds.

Rylyn Clark.

As I understand it, during the pandemic, young Rylyn told his mother that he wanted to sing this song to send to friends and family to cheer them up. And it is seriously the sweetest thing I have ever seen. Everything about it is perfect. He’s adorable and sooo sincere; his singing is beautiful, in tune, and in time; the idea behind it is incredibly kind, especially for one so young; and the entire thing is just darling.

I’ve kept it on my phone, and I promise you, watching it always calms me down. Rylyn is really convincing that “every little thing’s gonna be alright.” He even looks adorably worried for a second on the video, like he’s trying to convince us of the message.

By the way, there are several versions of this video; some people have added instrumentals, or background voices, and one group has actually made their own video from it!  But this is the original rendition, which is the purest, and it’s the one I first saw, so it’s the best one to me! www.youtube.com/watch?v=UCLuQYzrAPc

VIGGO VENN

If you need some good laughs, this is the vid for you! Mr. X and I have seen it so many times now that I can’t even count them. I’ve actually found my bae watching it by himself, and felt he was cheating on me!

Viggo Venn.

Just about eleven months ago, I was looking for images for an article about TV shows that I was writing. I came upon a story about Viggo Venn, a comedian who had won that year’s Britain’s Got Talent, despite Simon Cowell voting against Viggo’s audition for the show. So, of course, I had to see it for myself, to figure out who was correct—the voters or Simon. And I found that Viggo is…absolutely hilarious!!! I was hysterical within half a minute.

So I ran and got Mr. X to watch the rest with me. He was annoyed that I was disturbing him, especially because we often have different taste in videos, but the second Viggo said a word, we were both in hysterics. We love him so much that we immediately watched the rest of his performances on that series, and definitely agree that his victory was the correct choice.

Sometimes, when the world is getting me especially down, (like with all the evil being done to this country since January 20th,) watching this video helps me immensely. I hope, and actually know, it will do the same for anyone who appreciates funny and original material.  www.youtube.com/watch?v=j5mVIYPG4MA

JUDE, TO WHOM I REFER AS “THE FUNNY OLD KID”

OMG—Mr. X and I have watched this very brief convo between this little kid, Jude, and his mother, so many times that we can do it all by heart. Even nuttier than that is that we both quote him, and do his mannerisms, constantly.

Jude.

The kid is telling his mother about all the chores he has for the day, (it appears that they live on a ranch or farm or the like,) and he is hilarious while being totally serious about his “work.”  His list and actions are like those of a little old put-upon man. (This video has been making the rounds, and I noticed that someone on Twitter wrote, “This kid is at least forty-six and on his second divorce.”)

I did some research to find-out the kid’s name, (which is Jude,) and where he’s from. Mr. X and I agreed that it’s the South, but he thought that Jude sounded sort-of Cajun, which I’m pretty sure is incorrect. And that’s all the info I feel is fair to share about a child.  Except for that he’s adorable!  And his mom really knows how to talk to him to get the most fun out of him; and she has a lovely soothing voice, to boot.

It’s not a laugh-out-loud experience so much as a make-you-smile one. And I have a feeling you’ll want to see it again and again. And also want to water your lawn when it’s over!  x.com/klara_sjo/status/1874640187197890950

I hope you get as much enjoyment out of these vids as Mr. X and I do. And find some peace in Rylyn’s song. And if you need anything else to entertain you on the internet once you get going, finding that three amusements are not enough, you can always check-out my YouTube channel! I haven’t posted a new video in a little while, but there are enough on there to keep you busy for as long as you like. Here’s that link: www.youtube.com/channel/UCF7mwI2jwcB2xB9dBCBxLZg

I cannot believe that the Coronation is finally upon us! And I’m giving you more time than usual to get it all together. This way, you can enjoy watching the pomp and circumstance in the best ways possible.

Truth be told, I’m still not over the September death of Queen Elizabeth, whom I absolutely adored. However, I’m looking forward to this gigantic event because I’ve slowly become a fan of King Charles over the years, and I know that it’s time to move on now.

Then-Prince Charles and his mother, the late Queen Elizabeth.

By the way, Camilla, who will now be Queen, has also grown on me. As a fan of Princess Diana, I was never in Camilla’s corner back in the day. But I love a tale of true love, and that is what the royal couple obviously has. It’s an especially interesting one because it’s very unusual for a man to basically choose an older, unattractive woman over his beautiful young wife. (I saw a TV movie like that once, where Hal Linden’s character chose Anne Meara over Madolyn Smith. I didn’t think it could happen in real life, but Charles and Camilla have proven that it can.)

Along with the rest of the world, I’m so glad that the Markle woman won’t be there to spoil everyone’s time, as she surely would have. But did you notice that she announced she had just signed with a big show business agency this week, just to steal a little of the Royals’ thunder? What a rotten person she is.

All of us are giving waaay too much coverage to the evil Royal Family member, the Markel woman, so I figured I need to counteract all that with this glorious pic of perfect Princess Kate with her grandmother-in-law, the Queen.

I covered all the drama with Harry and his creepy wife last week, so I have only happy topics here today. (But, if you missed my rant, and are a fellow Markle-eschewer, here’s that link—you do not want to miss it!: itsnotaboutme.tv/news/karens-rantsgossip-upcoming-the-creepy-sussexes-vis-a-vis-the-kings-coronation.)

On a side note, this is something that amused me about the Coronation: King Charles’ former butler recently said, “This event is going to be so completely different to Queen Elizabeth II’s coronation.” Duh. For some, that was an actual lifetime ago!!! It’s been seventy years!!! Most everything in the world has changed! That’s not the profound statement he thought it was.

It’s perhaps the last occasion on which to share an image of the glowing young Queen, so here she is on her 21st birthday.

Now let’s get to the important info. The King’s Coronation takes place on this coming Saturday morning, May 6, at the crack of dawn United States time. I believe that means 1AM west coast time. It will be shown on many TV stations and streaming services. But I’m hoping to find it on the BBC feed, of course. (Or rather, hoping that Mr. X can find it, because he’s the one who does that stuff in our house.) That’s really the only way to watch the festivities, in my opinion.

Of course, I have a few tips for watching the Coronation to make it the most fun. I know we can all just watch it, period, but if you are into making it an event for yourselves, I’m here to suggest some ways to optimize your Coronation experience.

I’ve shared some of these before, for two of the Royal Weddings, but this grand occasion presents the perfect time for a refresher course, don’t you think?

MAKE IT A TRUE FETE

How lovely would it be to have a Coronation-themed soiree? If, as I am, you’re on the west coast of America, a late-night gathering will be perf. You can begin at midnight, which will be so unique that everyone who’s able to party at that hour should love it. (And invite me, please!) For you east coast-ers, how about a very early morning week-end pajama party brunch? (My readers in the rest of the world can figure it out accordingly.)

WARDROBE

Karen Salkin modeling one of her many fascinators. (And jewelry and nails!) Photo by INAM staff.

Women–you absolutely must wear a fascinator on your head. (If you’re not familiar with that type of chapeau, I’m modeling one in the pic on the left.)

And don’t forget the skinny gloves. Even if the rest of your ensemble is pajamas and a bathrobe, (which I hope will both be made of silk,) thin gloves, (when you’re not eating, of course,) and a fascinator are the order of the day. (And you can continue to rock that rare chapeau for the Kentucky Derby a bit later that same day!)

And, of course, all nail polish must be light pink. (I’ll show you mine in my Coronation review next week. I even filed my long nails down for the classy mani, which I’m proud to say I do myself, by the way.)

FOOD AND DRINK

What you feast on during the proceedings just might be the most important aspect of watching the Coronation, as opposed to just lying there with the TV on, (which could also be fun, actually, since it will be the middle of the night.)

As I hope that many of you know, my real area of dining expertise is Afternoon Tea, and I’m very exacting about it. Even though I’m usually super strict about the official rules* of this repast, I’m loosening them a bit for the Coronation, or else we would not be able to enjoy all that deliciousness at this early morning hour. *[Note: If you’d like to be in the know about the differences among the several possible tea meals, you can learn it all right here: itsnotaboutme.tv/news/national-daydiningkarens-lessons-happy-national-tea-day.]

The perfect tea for the occasion! Photo by Karen Salkin.

Since we’ll all be celebrating a happening in Jolly Old England, (where Afternoon Tea was invented,) I suggest you partake of at least some of these treats during the festivities, (even if that means that you’ll be adding crumbs to your bed!)

~ I’m sure that a few of you will love the excuse to sip a spot of sherry or champagne at this hour, so I say go for it!

~ Then don’t forget the actual tea. An English variety, (such as English Breakfast or Earl Grey,) is the most appropriate, of course, but I always find subtly-flavored ones, (such as vanilla, grapefruit, or cinnamon,) to be more delicious. I always add honey to mine, and sometimes a bit of milk, which is very British.  (Just remember to hold your teacup with your pinky out to the side!)

~ I wholeheartedly recommend that, at the very least, you dine on some scones with clotted cream and jam (my mouth is actually watering as I write that.) Scones are very filling, so even one of those treats should get you through most of the hours of Coronation coverage.

One of the Iveta scone mixes…

…and the gorgeous and delish scones that Karen Salkin baked from an Iveta mix herself! Photo by Karen Salkin.

What I’ll be doing is the easiest and most delicious of all. Over the years, I’ve whipped up the absolute best scones from Ivéta mixes. You just add a cup of cream to the mix, sprinkle it with sugar, bake it for a few minutes, and that’s it! No other ingredients or measuring or worrying. I think that Ivéta’s scone mixes are actually the reason I make an Afternoon Tea to begin with! My fave, of course, is their Chocolate Chip, but if I can stop being married to that flavor, I’m also planning on trying their Cinnamon Chip, Maple, new Apricot,  and Vanilla (which I’ve never seen anywhere else!)

In a pinch, you can just get a package of crumpets, (if you can find them.) They’re a good enough substitute for scones, but far less satisfying.

The best and official Clotted Cream, also from Iveta.

~ And please do not forget the clotted cream and jam with which to top the scones! You can get official Clotted Cream, Lemon Curd, and all kinds of upscale jams from Ivéta when you order your scone mixes. It’s one-stop-shopping without leaving the house! www.iveta.com

I’m making it all as easy as possible for you, so you have no excuse not to celebrate the Coronation in the best way possible.

~ Some fresh strawberries and cream, in any form, will be a lovely accompaniment. (And, with that dish, you can be satisfied knowing that you’re fulfilling a “fruit portion” of your diet so early in the day!) The easiest way to serve them is to have a bowl of fresh, washed, and hulled berries, and another bowl of whipped cream to dip them in. If more than just you and your fam are in attendance, provide individual ramekins of whipped cream for each guest to dip into, for health purposes.

~ It’s probably too early in the morning/day for anything heartier, but you can always also feature a few finger sandwiches. Cucumber and cream cheese ones will be the classiest, and a bit more early-morning-friendly. And most proper for the occasion. And an interesting flavored cream cheese spread, such as a nutty or sweet one, on cinnamon-raisin bread, will be perfect. (And it’s so easy to make—just spread it on the two sides of the sandwich, press together, and cut into quarters!)

~ Tiny desserts, such as petit fours or bite-sized brownies or cookies, are perfect to not only end the meal with, but in this case, to munch on throughout the Coronation and attendant events, such as the concert following it. But the most appropriate dessert, if you have time to whip it up the day before, (and the inclination, of course,) is English trifle.

Karen Salkin’s tea-at-home for yet another Royal event. Photo by Karen Salkin.

And serve everything in pretty cups and dishes. Remember, this is a once-or-twice-in-a-lifetime event, people!

AUXILIARIES

I absolutely adore this picture of Prince Phillip and the Queen still having a bit of a giggle together after all those years!

I suggest you have at least one big box of tissues handy, just in case. You may think you’re above the emotion of it all, and are just watching for the history of it, but I have a feeling that many of us, (and definitely yours truly,) will wind-up a tad teary over the proceedings.

And, more importantly, I’m praying for the safety of the entire United Kingdom during what will be one of the most important times for that country. I hate that these days we have to give even a second’s thought to what crazies might be planning. What a supreme shame it is that the world has gotten so scary.

Now back to the happiness of it all. Whether you watch live, (as Mr. X and I plan to do,) or record it to view later, I wish you all a fabulous Coronation Day. Ta-ta for now. And cheerio! And, especially, Long Live the King!

A little over ten years ago in this very e-zine, I posted an extremely bare-bones, basic list of things every woman needs in her life. In the opening paragraph, I wrote, “Here’s the original one, with my very first thoughts off the top of my head. Sometime down the line, I’ll re-visit it, give it real thought, and see how it’s changed, if at all.”

For now.

How prescient of me because, without even having re-read that, I recently figured it’s time to check on it, and see which have stood the test of time, and then perhaps add and subtract. (If you’re curious about that very first one, here’s that link: itsnotaboutme.tv/news/list-ten-things-every-woman-should-have. But promise not to judge! At least you’ll get to see just how far INAM has evolved in this past decade!)

The items on my list are all basically simple, which means they’re pretty easy to acquire. See how this list compares to your own thoughts on the topic.

(And no worries for the guys—I’ll get to you down the line. But #1 applies to absolutely everyone out there!)

1. Self-esteem—This one is self-explanatory. If it’s something you lack, (and doesn’t that apply to just about all of us?,) I’ll give you some tips on how to gain some in a future article on here. So, until then, stay as confident as possible, and remember that in this case, you can fake it till you make it. And then you may be able to teach something to the rest of us!

Lucy and Ethel–a wonderful example of close friendship.

2. One Friend You Can Really Trust–Every gal needs one friend who truly has her best interests at heart. And yes, I do know that this is the hardest item on this list to get. But once you weed through the fake and fair-weather friends, and find the true gold one, he or she will be a treasure for life.

3. One Reliable Doctor!– It would be great if he or she is your primary care doc, but, for us femmes, a fabulous, trustworthy gyno is even better. Just make sure to tell him or her every single thing about your overall health, so they come up with the best diagnoses.

4. Cash!–Yes, I know that the majority of us use credit cards or Apple Pay or the like these days, but in these crazy times you really need to carry even a little bit of cash. You never know when your credit card will be declined, even erroneously, so act like a Girl Scout and always Be Prepared!

5. Full-length Mirror—This one is no joke. A few years ago, my bestie at the time and I were trying on pants in a dressing room, and when I was shocked at how chubby I had gotten, she asked me, in all seriousness, “Don’t you have a mirror in your house?” I burst out laughing because it sounded so funny, but I realized I hadn’t been checking myself out properly because my full-length mirror was behind a door. Ever since, I’ve made a practice of making sure I know what I look like walking out the door.

6. A Reliable Cell Phone—Not just a cell phone—a reliable one. Like cash, every female should have a very working, fully-charged phone at the ready. I hope you never need it, but we should all have one at the ready, just in case of emergency. (And, yes, lunch is an emergency, ladies!)

Here’s a celebrity with a moustache–Kare Upton, who, as a top model, should know better!

7. Moustache Remover Cream–I cannot stress this one enough. I’m absolutely shocked by just how many females don’t know enough to get rid of their unfortunate ‘staches! Even some celebs. Years ago, I was trying to fix one of my female pals up with a cute guy friend. As I sang her praises, he asked, “So what’s wrong with her—she has a moustache?,” to which all his buddies laughed. And the sad thing was that, yes, she did have one. That she bleached! Trust me, ladies—that does not work. At all. It just gives you a blonde moustache. So please get rid of it with remover cream. Or have electrolysis. Shaving and threading just leave follicle stubble. Yuck.

And here’s some woman who did a “beauty” video, (which I saw only because it came on after my own mani tutorial,) who’s rocking a ‘stache while telling the rest of us how to do our make-up!!! Hey lady–look in the mirror first! (At least she’s wearing earrings, which you’ll read about below.)

8. Eyelash Curler—this is the simplest one, but, oh, what a difference it makes! Even if you’re too time-constrained, (or lazy,) to apply mascara, just a quick curling of the lashes will brighten your face.  Just don’t use one of the heated ones—it’s much too dangerous to put heat right up against your eyes!

9. Hand Cream—Even young guys have told me that they can tell a woman’s real age by her hands. So get into the habit of using hand cream at least twice daily, (one being when you’re going to bed,) no matter how old you are. The earlier in life the better, of course, but in this case, it’s really better late than never.

10. Lip Balm—Chapped lips look awful, (and feel even worse,) and there’s only way to ward that off—by daily and often use of any form of lip balm, preferably a slightly tinted one if your full face is going to be seen. Even all the creepy lip fillers won’t stop the condition, so heed my words.

The best, and least expensive, body exfoliator!

11. Exfoliation Mitt or Glove–I know that a lot of us are vigilant enough to moisturize our bodies, but it really doesn’t achieve maximum effectiveness unless you first exfoliate your skin. So, before you step into the shower, or even if you’re not taking one at the moment, just pop on an exfoliation mitt or glove, and do a quick once-over of your body. That gets rid of all the dead cells, leaving your skin ready for deep penetration of the lotion or cream or body butter. (I first discovered the glove version at an uber-high-end spa in the Desert. I couldn’t imagine what luxurious item the woman was using to exfoliate my body, and when it was over, she showed me it was just a glove from a dollar store!!! That changed my life, as I’m hoping to do yours.)

A hodgepodge of earrings.

12. Earrings–I just never think any female looks complete without earrings. My mother never wore make-up except for lipstick, but she would not be seen without earrings. And she had to wear clip-ons because, being the very natural woman that she was, she wouldn’t pierce her ears. The funny thing is that for a few years when I was doing my TV show, and my hair guy cut all of my hair off by accident, I wore mis-matched earrings all the time, (which was perhaps to distract people from my suddenly almost-bare head,) and then in her later years, my mother did the same thing, but even though sort-of on purpose, with no design in mind. She just kept a bunch of earrings in the little pocket of the car door, and she took out any old two as she was emerging into the public!

And here’s a pair of auxiliary ones for those of you who can’t live without a vehicle:

A Reliable Car—If you live in a place where public transportation is not an option, or a good one, it’s important to make sure that your vehicle is reliable. It can even be an old jalopy, (or the modern-day version of one,) but it has to be reliable. I’ve actually been broken down a few times with girlfriends who didn’t put the wellness of their car at a premium, and they were very not fun experiences.

A Reliable Mechanic—Same as above. Sort-of. If you own a car, or even a motorcycle, you must be able to trust that its mechanic is not going to rip you off. Ask friends, family, and associates; look up reviews on-line; do general research around your neighborhood; and even visit a few garages before you choose one. And always trust your gut for the final decision.

And that’s my list. For now. I’m sure many more will come to me as life goes one, and then I’ll publish A Dozen (or so) Things Every Woman Needs, Part II. In the meantime, I’d love to know what you deem essential, so please share those thoughts in the Comments section below.

Mr. X and I always joke that if something ever happened to us, no one would ever know. He has always rarely* gone out socially, and the pandemic has kept me in the house so much that nobody thinks it’s odd to not see me at events nowadays. Yes, it’s not a lovely thing to joke about, but the most recent one reminded me to write this safety article! *[Note: I know “always rarely” sounds wrong, but it is correct in this case.]

Before the isolation of the pandemic, at least a few people saw me several times a week, so there were no worries there. But they’ve always had to just take my word about the okay-ness of my hermetic bae.

Then when the pandemic hit, I began worrying about everyone, especially my friends who live alone, even the young ‘uns. So I made sure to call at least one pal a day for the duration.

Yes, of course they, too, should have checked on us, but people, in general, seem to think that if a couple lives together, they’re always okay. And that is an applicable theory, to a point. But everyone needs to be checked in with, at least occasionally, and in some cases, often.

Actress Alicia Witt and her parents.

Take the case of actress Alicia Witt’s poor parents. They were found dead in their home in Boston at the end of last year, and nobody knew for days! According to many reliable reports, they both succumbed to what has been deemed to be “terminal exposure to the cold” due to their home not having enough heat because the whole place was in disrepair. Alicia has said that her parents didn’t want help, but, in my opinion, she still should have been calling them every single day! She has stated that she hadn’t heard from them in several days, so maybe they could have been saved if she had called the authorities right away.

But perhaps she felt as friends do about Mr. X and me—that we have each other, so nothing bad can happen. I pray that that is always our case, (knock on wood,) but I seriously hope that when we get old, we have at least one friend who will check on us daily.

If my mother left her house without letting me know beforehand, even though she was across the country from me, I got hysterical. I would even call my sister, to whom I didn’t speak otherwise, to make sure she could run over to the house to check on my little mo, if need be.

While looking for appropriate images for this article, I came upon this pic of Angie Dickinson in Ocean’s Eleven. And I realized how perfect it is here because…she’s one of my best friends, and one with whom I always check in!

So now, with rampant crime going on all over today, I think it’s especially important to check on people. Just a quick phone call, email, or text. Besides that it helps the peace of mind of the checker, it also can cheer up the checkee; most people, especially older ones, love being thought of!

So, please, if you know someone who lives alone, no matter what age, make it a practice to see how they’re doing from time to time.

And singletons—please stop whatever you’re doing right this minute, and make a pact with one friend to do daily check-ins. You can choose the method that takes the least amount of time.

I have to add one more note of something that just came up while I was writing this. I saw some beautiful pix that an old friend took of a lovely hiking trail near his new home in a city that I consider to be somewhat unsafe right now. And it reminded me of a petit park that I used to walk in when I stayed with my friends in Providence. It felt wonderful and peaceful to be enjoying that refreshing nature all the time, until one day I heard a noise, and started worrying that someone might jump out of the greenery and harm me. (Yes, I do watch way too many magazine shows.) So, here’s another admonition, this time on the “being checked on” side of things—as much as time alone with nature is a literal breath of fresh air, please let someone know where you’re going, and that you’ll let them when you’re, literally, out of the woods! (Or wherever your own place may be.)

Photo by Kerry Simons.

Perhaps you and one friend can make a plan to end the day with a quick text, just to say everything’s okay.* Of course, hearing someone’s voice is always better, but if that leads to a long phone chat, which you don’t have time for, a quick text or email is good enough. Or maybe set-up some kind of round robin. *[Note: you can always turn it into a fun ritual—my end-of-high-school best bud and I used to call each other to end every night dueting on Happy Trails! I still laugh at how crazy that was. You can create your own special memories while giving each other peace of mind.]

I’d write more, but proofreading this just convinced myself—I have to go call a few alone-living pals right now!

Stay safe, everyone!

Growing-up, I was very lucky to have schoolteachers for parents because that meant my whole family could be together all summer long. My wonderful mother posted weekly calendars on the refrigerator of what she had planned for every day, so we three kids could have things to look forward to.

The world is very different now, so it takes a mix of old school and modern activities to keep the kiddies entertained these days, especially when they’re off from school for a couple of months. You definitely don’t want their summer to be full of just video games, television, and being glued to their phones.

So, as a former elementary school teacher myself, not to mention a major fun-lover, here are some of my ideas on how to keep the kids entertained on a daily basis this summer:

~ Beach day

A real-life aquarium visit with my old pals Isaac and Sharon Abromov(a.) Photo by Karen Salkin.

~ Visit to the zoo or aquarium

~ Day trip to visit close-by-but-out-of-town pals who have kids of similar ages

~ On a rainy day, stay in and make written or picture diaries of “what I did this summer.”

~ Movie days, at home or in theaters again. (Watching one on a sheet in the backyard is especially fun!)

~ Nature walks

~ If you have to work throughout the summer, look into sending your kids to Day Camp, if there’s one in your area.

~ Have them do lots of fun basic sports, as long as there’s a safe place to do them, with some grown-up supervision

My almost grown-up pal Marcus Jocelyn, engrossed in one of our favorite young adult books! Photo by Amanda Hazel.

~ Here’s a novel idea—have them read books!  Perhaps your childhood faves. Or have a book club with your fam, or they can do it with the kids in your neighborhood. Or…visit the library!

~ Go to special summer festivals, carnivals, bazaars, and fairs

~ Visit amusement or water parks

~ Have them emulate a young Steven Spielberg! His mother was a fan of my show, and called to ask me to review her restaurant on it! My parents were in town then, so Leah Adler hosted us all for dinner. My mother loved the story she told us about how Steven used to always make his own mini-movies when he was a kid. (My friends and I produced stage shows for the neighborhood, so I guess Spielberg was more prescient than we were because movies make waaay more money!) Your own children can do it all over the course of the summer, from writing to casting to wardrobe, to shooting. It will be very fun and uber-educational. (And who knows—perhaps it will also be a prelude to their own Oscar down the road!)

~ Take a day at a lake or park

~ Go on mini road trips to explore

Keir (in the middle) and Ellery (on the left) Sampson being kind, back in the day, by treating their old pal Karen Salkin to their favorite treat! Photo by Thea Kearney.

~ Do a lot of “kindness days.” That’s the most important activity in my book. They can help at a hospital, clean-up a beach, do small errands for elderly neighbors, make cookies for friends, or just go through their closets and toys for donations. I hope there will be several of these days all summer, at least one a week.

~ Even have them do a “clean up the house day”

~ Hikes, (but never alone)

~ Dance parties

~ Camping under the stars, (in the backyard, of course, and only where it’s safe and with adult supervision.)

~ Barbecues, either at home or in the designated area of a neighborhood park

~ Drive-in movies, if you’re lucky enough to have any near enough to you

~ Museums, now that you have a whole day to spend there, without having to rush or be stuck in crowds.

An art party (on a bus!,) for the Aviv-West children and their friends, a few years ago. Photo by Karen Salkin.

~ There are all kinds of teaching situations that they don’t learn in school, such as home “cooking school,” now that there’s time to give it more attention, or art work that takes longer than can be done in one period of art class.

~ Game days, using just their minds. My fave was always Twenty Questions played sitting outside on a summer evening with relatives of all age groups.

~ Of course, Fourth of July fireworks. Some places even have them several times a summer, so check for that where you live.

~ And my fave—playing board games in the house on a rainy summer day!

I have to stop myself because if I go any further, forget the summer—they’ll need all year to get this all done!

Happy Having Family Fun!

No, that title is not a euphemism for getting rid of Facebook friends, nor even real ones! I’m talking about literal cleaning. In the Spring!

I’ve been so upset that I didn’t use my time in the house for these past two years to clean and de-clutter it, that now I’m wasting even more time ruing that decision!

So now that it’s Spring, I’m about to finally get going on that project. And maybe my doing it will give you the impetus to do it, as well.

The easiest way is to just tackle one task a day, and you’ll be all set by the time summer roles around. (Spring began almost a month ago, so get started already! You have until the Summer Solstice on June 21st to make it official.)

Here are some Spring Cleaning tips I’ve started to follow, which I culled from the internet, magazines, and actual people who use them. I hope they help all of us!!!

~ Tell yourself that you’re going to do just a short time each day, like ten-to-thirty minutes. That way your mind won’t be tortured about it beforehand.

~ Maybe crank up some music with a good beat to get you going.

~ Begin by cleaning windows with a solution of water and white vinegar; the new clean light coming from them will help you see everything—both the good and what needs to be cleaned next—more clearly.

~ Speaking of windows, open them while you work. You’ll not only be getting rid of any fumes from cleaning products, but you’ll be bringing the fresh Spring air in, which helps on every level!

~ My favorite thing to do is recycle. It’s so satisfying because I’m ridding my space of unwanted materials while also cleaning-up the planet! It’s a true win-win. And you’ll be surprised how much space it clears-out in the long run. (Just first check the internet for the rules in your area. One of my pals once thought the sanitation workers go through her garbage bags to take out the items that should be re-cycled!!! OMG! How crazy was that???)

~ If you’re dusting anything high up, like ceiling fans, fixtures, curtains, blinds, or the ceiling itself, make sure to do that before you do anything down low, like floors or vacuuming.

~ Don’t vacuum until you’ve tended to your carpets or rugs to get rid of odors (that you may not even be aware of!)  Sprinkle baking soda on them, leave it there for ten to twenty minutes, and then just vacuum it up. Voila—that can count as your entire spring cleaning for one day! I know it will for me, even though I’m sure I’ll be Tom Sawyering Mr. X into doing that chore for me.

~ I detest going through my clothing closets! But when I do, (about twice a year,) I always find so many fun items I had forgotten about. I really can’t do any of it the Marie Kondo way, (the de-clutter expert says to chuck every item that doesn’t bring you joy,) because I love just about every item of wardrobe I’ve ever acquired! (My parents were once visiting and my father opened my main closets and let out a bewildered, “What is this? Costumes???”) But when I know in my heart that I’ll never wear it again, and someone else could really benefit from it, it’s much easier to donate to a worthy charity. And as big as my body has grown in recent years, my heart does, as well, when I give to others in need. (Ahh—I know it sounds sort-of sappy, but it’s true. So your soul can benefit from Spring Cleaning, as much as your house does.)

These are just a few tips to help you get started; you’ll discover many more on your own once you really get into it.

If nothing else I wrote here provides the push you need to get started, how about this one—cleaning burns tons of calories!!! Wait—I think I hear all of you pulling out the brooms and stepladders right now! And I’m for sure joining you!

With 2022 just a few days away, (not mention that none of us should really be going out again now, because of Omicron,) I have a really fun idea for your New Year’s festivities.

Some of the fare at one of Heidi’s at-home NYD parties, balancing on the fabulous-footwear-adorned legs of Karen Salkin. Photo by Karen Salkin.

But it actually did not come out of my brain. My friend Heidi Rotbart hosted this fun stay-at-home event last New Year’s Day, but it would be just as entertaining to do for those of you who have a group of friends who don’t like to go out on New Year’s Eve.

First, here’s the background of how the idea came about. Heidi has always thrown the absolute best New Year’s Day parties. Hence, at the beginning of this year, when gatherings were not possible, she didn’t want to disappoint her usual guests. So she hosted a wonderful Zoom fete instead.

But this wasn’t the usual just-sit-around-and-talk Zoom; it had a really fun twist, which I’ll tell you about in a second. But first I have to say that even though I absolutely adore, and greatly missed, the fabulous food and camaraderie at her in-person fetes, it was nice to get to stay in our slept-in pajamas for this Zoom one. We always wear PJs to her soirees, anyway, (or should—that’s what the hostess requests and I hate when people feel that they’re above complying!,) which I love doing, but this time we got to just roll out of bed and not take a shower before donning better nightwear and doing our hair and make-up. That was a plus. (The pajamas thing would work just as well on New Year’s Eve, because you all get to get cozy early in the evening, and stay that way until…next year!*) *(That’s always my dumb joke for New Year’s Eve—I tell people that I won’t be talking to them “until next year,” which is just the next day. I never claimed to not be goony!)

Karen Salkin getting ready to “attend” the New Year’s Day 2021 Zoom party, rocking her new holiday PJs and her official Ringling Bros. Circus clown slippers, and wondering if she’ll win the treasure hunt! Photo by Mr. X.

Now here’s that twist–Heidi made a really fun game for us. It was a treasure hunt…in each of our own abodes! We had to find simple things, like a clock, a pencil, a scarf, etc. (Which means…we all had to wear pajama bottoms because we kept getting up to find the items. That might be a first on a Zoom call!) But to make it even more fun, (and more of a challenge,) the clues were in rhyme form.  So not only did we have to see if we had the items on hand, (like a home version of Let’s Make A Deal,) but first we had to figure-out the clues!

Neither Heidi nor I still have the clues on hand to share with you, but they went something like this: “This healthful beauty comes in green or red, you’ll find it in your refrigerator and not in your bed.” And the answer is: An apple! Or this year, a clue can be: “If at your job you don’t want to get axed, you’ll need these two to prove you got vaxxed.” And the answer, of course, is your vaccination card and your ID! [Note: If you don’t have those two items, you lose in life as well as in the game!]

Of course, I won the 2021 treasure hunt. (Did you ever doubt it? My house is like a permanent swap meet over here!)  And the prize was…money. Venmo-ed to me!  Yay!  (But don’t get excited for me—it was only about a fin. Which is still better than nothing. And I love, love, love winning!)

Wouldn’t it be fun if the pajama-clad guys from BTS were on your party zoom? (I’m showing THEM to respect the privacy of the actual people on our call last year.)

I have a feeling the entire event was as fun to plan as it was to participate in. I don’t know if Heidi will do it all again on New Year’s Day 2022, (because in-person gatherings are back to looking iffy,) or if any of you will do it now that you know how to, but no worries if you can’t get it together in time for that date—the “Treasure Hunt Zoom” is one that can be done at any time of year, for any occasion.

So have fun with it, and Happy (Treasure) Hunting!

I’m excited that now that I’ve had my third Covid vaccine I’ll be attending a show this very week-end, for the first time in a year and three-quarters!!! I don’t think that I’ve ever been away from the theatre for that long since I was around two!!!

Now that theatres all over have finally opened up again, we have the incredible opportunity to begin our experiences at those venues anew, and to become better audience members than we were before.

Just a very few of my own hundreds of theatre programs! Photo by Karen Salkin, as is the pic at the top of this article.

I actually have many suggestions of how to accomplish that, but, not wanting to overwhelm anyone, I’m concentrating on one tiny improvement today. And that is…to read your programs! Not during the presentation, of course, which I’ve seen some rudesters do over the years. (So they’re abusing their eyes as well as the people around them.) But either before the show begins, at intermission, or even at home.

There’s actually a lot to learn in the programs; they’re usually a fount of information! First and foremost, you learn about the players, some of whom you may even see in the future. When I was cleaning-out my childhood home a few years ago, I came upon a treasure trove of old Playbills from Broadway and off-Broadways shows; I had even saved a bunch from all the summer stock my parents were smart enough to take us to. And I came upon one from when I was a little girl, with the entire Daly family in it—James Daly and his future-star children, Tyne and Tim! I’m so glad I took the time to re-read those old programs.

In some of the modern-day ones, you can often find-out the interesting backgrounds of shows. And, of course, even though many of them are actually advertisements, there are usually restaurant recommendations for the area of the theatre you’re in.

The notices in the middle of one theatre’s program, asking patrons to refrain from wearing fragrances! Photo by Karen Salkin.

But, most importantly to me, even though it’s in small print in the middle of a further-back page, is the note to not wear fragrances!!! It’s obviously too late for the admonition when the patrons are seeing it, but we can all hope they’ll remember it for next time. It is truly beyond rude to wear any sort of fragrance to the theatre where you know you’re going to be sitting shoulder-to-shoulder with a stranger who might have health issues! Please, everyone, try to have even a modicum of kindness when you’re going to be around other people!

One of the few good aspects of being forced to stay in the house for a year and a half is that…I’ve had no asthma attacks! Not a one. That’s because I haven’t been near anyone who’s wearing perfume, or has cat hair on their clothing, or has recently smoked a cigarette, the trio of things that threaten my life. Literally!

Now if only the programs would caution people to not wear their hair up, or wear hats, or glasses on their heads, all of which obstruct the view of the people behind them. And ask them not to chew gum loudly, constantly play with their hair, or stage-whisper to the person next to them.

Another theatre’s program notice asking audience members to refrain from other rude behaviors. Photo by Karen Salkin.

And it would be wonderful if they’d ask audience members to not look at their phones during the performance, because the light is annoying to everyone around them. Believe me, you all know how sports-obsessed I am, but I would never check my phone for scores during a production, as I see so many men do!!! I marvel at how people can be so rude.

While some programs do say to please not text during the show, (and theatres even make announcements to that effect before the show begins, along with telling them to not open their noisy candy during the show,) it boggles my mind that even one person would require that talking-to.

What writing this is making me realize is just how sad it is that people need these reminders of how to be courteous to their fellow man to begin with. Shame on the ones who don’t know how to act in public.

So if everyone would please just heed all these suggestions, the polite among us would be the happiest theatre-goers ever! Now read those programs to see what else you can find-out in them.

Shockingly for me, who usually feels bad about something every day, I have not grumbled even a tiny bit about being stuck at home during the pandemic. I’m grateful that it hasn’t negatively affected my daily life, (except for bringing my looks down a bit, which you can see for yourself here in my latest YouTube video, telling a funnily painful story from my life, which I hope will give you all a tiny bit of joy: www.youtube.com/watch?v=sRorvsWZn6Y&feature=youtu.be.)

This kid looks to have found joy.

And I’m more than happy to do my part to stop the spread of the virus. (I wish that everyone would, instead of acting like things are normal again, which they definitely are not!)

But being the Empath that I’m always told I am, I can’t help but be depressed for the rest of the world during these incredibly trying times. The totally unnecessary loss of so many lives has gotten to me the most, of course, but I’m also concerned about the loss of jobs, kids having this very weird upbringing, elderly people not being able to see their loved ones, and just daily life being turned upside down for so many.

For some reason, the onset of Fall is when it finally hit me a little for myself, and made me a tad more depressed about it all. That was because, on the shallowest of personal notes, I got just a little blue over not getting to wear all my fabulous Fall outfits this year! Yes, I know that I could have worn them, but it doesn’t count if no one would see them! I’ve always dressed to entertain the public; never for myself, nor even Mr. X, (except for that one secret neon green dress, but that’s a story that will remain private!)

What has upset me the most for the past several months is seeing people acting like it’s all clear now. I don’t understand how anyone can be dancing on TV, dining out, having get-togethers, etc., like there’s not a care in the world.

As does this one.

Even worse is when they make believe they’re wearing masks and socially-distancing! I recently received an invitation for a cocktail party in the tiniest eatery in New York. It’s bad enough they were having it then to begin with, but the invite said, “Masks must be worn upon entry; Social Distancing practices apply.” Notice the “upon entry” part—it means you can take it off for the duration of the party since everyone will be eating and drinking. And in this self-described “cozy” fifteen-seat space, no more than a handful of people can be 6’ apart, which is how “social distancing” is basically defined at the moment. (The experts say it really should be much more than that.) Even though I love the food there, you couldn’t pay me to attend!

So, to keep sane in the middle of my now-over-nine months of isolation*, I made a conscious decision to find joy in the little things, and concentrate on those. Here are some of mine; I’m hoping they will encourage you all to do the same:

~ That my solitaire cards turned adorably Christmas-themed a few weeks ago.

~ Needing breakfast dishes in the morning, seeing that the cupboard is bare, and then remembering that I did a dishwasher load in the middle of the night, so clean dishes are all ready for me!

~ That Mr. X and I have discovered that I’m a great cook! Who knew???

~ Watching a couple of old movies in a row, and not feeling guilty about it, like I have to get up and do anything else right then.

~ Happening upon a never-before-opened make-up item, such as mascara or lipstick, (although I have no idea when I’m ever going to get to wear the latter ever again! But at least I’ll be all ready when I do.)

~ Discovering all kinds of really old TV shows, which are incredibly calming right now. (If you missed my lauding of Perry Mason, you can read it here: itsnotaboutme.tv/news/television-my-summer-of-perry-mason.)

~ Wearing the new slipper-socks that someone sent me recently—they are the coziest footwear ever, and I get a bit of joy every time I put them on!

~ Finding unremembered pictures of long ago happy times.

~ Donning last year’s red holiday pajamas set, and still having this year’s new blue one to look forward to, (which is good because I’m in PJs at least three-quarters of the time now, anyway! Isn’t everyone?)

~ Opening a hidden-away box and seeing my set of beloved mint green plates which I was just wondering what happened to!

I even found joy in searching for the images to use in this article!

So, to get you started on a bit for yourself, here’s that link again to my latest YouTube video, which I sincerely hope will spark some joy in all of you: www.youtube.com/watch?v=sRorvsWZn6Y&feature=youtu.be.

What are your little joys? Please share them in the Comments section below, so that we can all inspire each other.

*[Note: “Isolation” is not really the right word because I’m not isolated—I’m with Mr. X. Isolated means to be alone, solitary, separated from other persons or things. But “quarantine,” “lockdown,” and “sequestered” are not exactly correct, either. (Dictionaries exist for a reason, people.) The appropriate word is more like “semi-mandated-and-the-only-smart-move-of-staying-at-home-until-the-pandemic-is-all-over.” But since that’s crazy long, (not to mention not a real word,) just please know what I mean when I say “isolation” from here on out.]

Last week, there was a really terrible fire right near my house. It was less than a mile away, and as Mr. X and I watched the horror unfold on TV, waiting to see if they would tell us to evacuate, we realized that we need to make “go bags,” even if not for that exact day; there have been tons of fires in our area recently.

Terrible pic of Karen Salkin and her best friend, Froggy, taken on her exact middle-of-the-night birthday, which is why they both look so freaked-out by the extreme flash! Taken by…Karen Salkin! (But shh…don’t tell Froggy about Karen holding hands with the big dude at the top of this page!)

Mr. X asked me what we should grab if we had to go right then, and my very first word was telling–“Froggy!!!”

Yes, over money, meds, and valuable work, my first thought was of my treasured best friend. Oh, have I mentioned that’s he’s a stuffed animal?! Well, maybe to the rest of the world he is, but not to me. He is truly my best buddy. Froggy has been my loyal companion ever since I first moved out here as a teen-ager. It’s a long story, but we locked eyes in a store in my hallowed Westwood Village and he’s been by my side ever since. (I’ve even given Froggy three or four new bodies over the many years we’ve been together, and did an eye “surgery” too! His latest tongue actually looks just like the one on Clarence, my beloved late toy poodle!)

Yes, I am aware of just how crazy all that sounds, but not to others like me, who are wise enough to realize the health value of having even a non-living entity to love. Grown-ups usually don’t want to admit it, but many have their own version of Froggy. I’m not going to name names, but you know who you are! (And I’m proud of you.)

And let me tell you—he’s been absolutely comforting through thick and thin. I really can’t even fall asleep anymore unless I’m clutching him! I can’t tell you how beneficial it was to have Froggy when my precious Clarence died. He was not a substitute at all, but just having him to hug helped me get through those first terrible nights. (And he still does!)

And you know what—everyone in the world should have a stuffed animal to love. It doesn’t have to be your childhood pal, or even a long-term one, as Froggy is to me. About a year after my father died, I got my mother the softest little stuffed dog you’ve ever felt! The second I gave him to her, she named him, somewhat strangely, “Beauvoir!” Where she came up with that one, even she had no idea, but it suited him. And about a month later, she told me that she didn’t have trouble sleeping anymore!

Just some of Karen’s mother’s pals in Brooklyn. Photo by Karen Salkin.

Beauvoir was the one she cuddled up with to sleep, but my little mo was no stranger to stuffed pals! She had started collecting dolls and such years before, long before my father passed. But after he was gone, her collection grew by leaps and bounds, mainly from me, but many of my friends gifted her, as well. Of the three couches in the living room, one was “hers,” one was basically “mine,” (because I visited her in New York so often,) and the third one was “theirs.” And she loved them all. Especially the fabulous singing bears I found in a specialty shop in Rhode Island. She could not get enough of those!

And they really did keep her company and cheer her up. Occasionally I even heard her talking to them, which I totally understood because I converse with Froggy quite often myself. Again, it’s comforting. (Okay, she might have gone a bit overboard by making me find panties for the “naked” animals! But she didn’t want them to be cold!)

Clarence lying amidst just a few of Maybelle’s stuffed pals! Photo by Mr. X.

Here’s one of my favorite stories, about all of us! On one of Mr. X and my visits to my mother in New York, we woke-up one morning to find that Clarence, (our real-life dog, in case you don’t remember that darling boy,) was not in my bed. He wasn’t with Mr. X either, (we slept in separate rooms in my parents’ house, which was our own respectful choice,) nor with my mother. We were hysterical. The three of us ran all over the house like lunatics, screaming for him all the way. We even looked outside, just in case. We were afraid that maybe he had crawled away somewhere to leave this level of life. We were beside ourselves!!!

And then my mother spotted him, though I have no idea how. He was calmly sleeping on the couch with her stuffed menagerie. We hadn’t seen him earlier because his fluffy white blended right in with them! So even our adorable little dog loved being around his stuffed brethren.

(Clockwise, from bottom left): Froggy, Odie, Doggie, Bernie, and Little Piggy. Photo by Karen Salkin.

Back to Froggy for a second. He now has his own friends. There’s Doggie, (who Mr. X and I gave my mother for Christmas 2010, so she had him for exactly the last year of her life and she loved him so much,) and Odie (for “Other Dog,” who showed up in my room in Brooklyn one day, and I still have no idea where he came from! Then Mr. X threw him in the washing machine here, by accident, because he got caught in the sheets, so we love him even more because he needs us now.)

And okay, I have to admit there are a few more furry friends hanging around our house. There’s Bernie the St. Bernard, who lives on the living room couch so I can hug him whenever I take a nap there. And he has his own little friend, Little Piggy, because I didn’t want Bernie to be lonely. Okay, so maybe I am a tad nutty. But everything I told you about what help stuffed animals can be to one’s emotional health is the truth.

So if you or your children or anyone you know is having a little bit of a hard time with loneliness, anxiety, depression, or the like, maybe you should really consider giving them, or yourself, a little stuffed animal friend. I promise, you will love him!

(L-R) Raggedy Andy, Raggedy Ann, and Doggie, all gifts from Karen Salkin to her mother, to further her fun collection of buddies. Photo by Karen Salkin.

The point of all this is—no, not that my mother and I are crazy—that the right stuffed animal(s) can really help your health and soul. I believe their positive effects have been proven by studies more scientific than my observations. Just having someone to cuddle with, and possibly have actual love for, can soothe a broken psyche, if even for the night. And you can always vent to them, with no judgement rendered. And how often does that happen with human confidantes?!

I’m very serious about all of this. If you’re someone who’s in need of a modicum of TLC, but don’t know where to turn, please, please, please, try a stuffed animal. Just make sure it’s the right one. (And if you’re allergic, never mind this whole topic.)

Happy New Stuffed Buddy Finding, from Froggy and me!