AWARD SHOW: GOLDEN GLOBES 2015

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GOLDEN GLOBES 2015

It was with a heavy heart that I watched the Golden Globes this year. My good friend Taylor Negron had just passed away the day before, so I wasn’t in a party mood.

And I definitely wasn’t in the mood to be snarky. I know that Taylor loved my snark, but I still wanted to give the world a break. (If you missed my tribute to him yesterday, you can read it here: itsnotaboutme.tv/news/tributerip-tribute-to-taylor-negron.)

Luckily for us, my instincts took over, and I was able to come up with all the following bon mots! Yay! They may not be my best, but at least I had some.

Portent of things to come:  Kate Hudson's Dopey ears! Photo by Karen Salkin.

Portent of things to come: Kate Hudson’s Dopey ears! Photo by Karen Salkin.

[Note: At Mr. X’s urging, I live-tweeted the Globes and some of the arrivals on E. I was planning to re-print all the tweets here, but realized many of you have seen them already. If you haven’t, you can still check them out on Twitter @MajorCelebrity. (I was thrilled to discover that my nice tweets got as many re-tweets and favorites as my not-so-nice ones!) So, below are just a few of the notes I took that didn’t make it on to Twitter.]

So, here goes, in order that they happened:

 

ARRIVALS ON E

 

Rosamund Pike's horrible Vera Wang dress!  Why would she want to feature saggy boobs, and her wrinkly, untoned body?  She should have us all just concentrate on her beautiful face!

Rosamund Pike’s horrible Vera Wang dress! Why would she want to feature saggy boobs, and her wrinkly, untoned body? She should have us all just concentrate on her beautiful face!

Hideous dress on Rosalind Pike! Her boobs look really weird in that ill-fitting mess. What happened to Vera Wang’s former talent?!

The host woman Guliana’s arms are nauseating. Ugh. She’s hard to watch while I was eating which is something she needs to be doing! Mr. X walked into the room while she was on the screen, and was appalled.

I love Naomi Watts.

I cannot understand why these famous women would chose to showcase such pale skin, some with dresses to match! And some even with faded tan lines. Where are the good stylists in this town. I tweeted about some of them already, but here are more to add to the “too-pale skin” list: Emily Blunt, Jessica Chastain, Julianne Moore, Julianna Margulies, and Kate Hudson. They all need to stop wearing white with white skin.

If guess Kevin Spacey is tired of the decades-long rumors about him being gay, so he kept pawing his “date” Kate Mara. It was creepy.

 

ACTUAL SHOW

 

Excellent monologue, especially the line about George Clooney and his wife!

Jennifer Aniston has good skin color. Hers is almost as good as that of Gina Rodriguez, actually.

Judith Light, featuring her wrinkly, bony non-cleavage.  I'm still scratching my head over this one! Photo by Karen Salkin.

Judith Light, featuring her wrinkly, bony non-cleavage. I’m still scratching my head over this one! Photo by Karen Salkin.

I’ve seen most of the films, and I’m not sure about journeyman actor JK Simmons’ win over Robert Duvall and Ed Norton. That seems like something the SAG Awards would do, (recognize a non-famous guy over established stars, although they really never do,) rather than Hollywood Foreign Press, who always seem to be professional versions of starf***ers.

JLo, wow! What a dress! And she’s wears it proudly.

We’ve all admired JLo’s fabulous cleavage, but why on earth would Judith Light feature her old, wrinkly, bony area?!

Shocking win for Gina Rodriguez, (and I watch her show!,) but excellent speech. (I hate to say it, butI think this one was to bring the Latin community in.)

Good speeches by song-writing victors Common and John Legend.

Willow Bay rudely texting, on the bottom right, during Common's emotional speech about Selma.  Disgusting behavior. Photo by Karen Salkin.

Willow Bay rudely texting, on the bottom right, during Common’s emotional speech about Selma. Disgusting behavior. Photo by Karen Salkin.

How rude was it of Willow Bay, wife of Disney CEO Robert Iger, to be texting during the above speech??? It’s rude enough from anywhere, but she was sitting at the front table! I’m so glad the director of the telecast was obviously busting her because that was the only shot he did from behind the speakers!

Why in the world would Kate Hudson feature her Dopey ears?! (I can say that because mine are almost as bad. Not quite, but I still wouldn’t feature them on national television!) [See photo at the top of this column.]

Good heartfelt speech from Michael Keaton. I’ve been enjoying his recent success. When I was a young girl just starting-out, a pal invited me to a taping of a pilot he was starring in. There was a small after-party in a backstage room, and my supposed friend (who was in the show) just left me sitting there alone all night, without introducing me to even one person. Michael saw that, and came up to talk to me, and make me feel comfortable. I really appreciated that!

And that’s it for this year’s Golden Globes. Almost. I have a couple of the gifting suites to let you in on in the next few days. (And don’t forget to check-out my tweets about it all! @MajorCelebrity.)

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1 Comment

  1. Didn’t think you would review the GGs because of your friend Taylor, but I’m glad you did. I always look forward to your award show reviews.

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